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Permalink Reply by GetEmGirl on March 27, 2008 at 7:54pm

You are doing the right thing! These days it's a lot easier to appear "busy." For instance, when alone, you should keep your hands busy, don't worry about walking around. Have a drink in your hand, look at your watch, play with your phone. It will make you look like you got things to do. After you get more comfortable chilling alone, you won't need to do anything but show up. If someone asks you who you there with you can say "I was meeting someone, but..." or just tell them you are rolling for self. It depends on their vibe. But I would suggest saying you meeting someone. because sometimes men like to cling on to you when they know you are alone. It gives you an easy out.

I'm sure other posters will have more tips. But girl, keep doing what you doin...fellas love that. I love a man who can roll through a spot by himself without a gang of dudes.

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Permalink Reply by Cassandra on March 27, 2008 at 8:16pm

Its no thing to go out by yourself. If you tell a man you came alone, they will be so much more attracted to your confidence. To be able to come out by yourself and not have to have a girlfriend with you as a clutch turns a guy on. That lets them know you are a GO GETTER. Why should you sit in the house because your girl doesn't want to come out. You meet so many people that way. If you don't feel like being bothered, simply tell the person, I don't feel like being bothered, I'm here by myself to enjoy myself.

I do it all the time. My girls can be lames sometimes and Cassandra's hot ass can't sit still sometimes, so I'll guy by the bar and purchase all my drinks. Guys will send me drinks because they notice I'm by myself. I don't walk around too much, or dance too much by myself. I just sip and watch and leave, sometimes ALOne.

Learn to enjoy yourself, you don't have to have nobody to make you have fun. Have your own fun. Be your own best friend.

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Permalink Reply by MsTrouble on March 27, 2008 at 9:13pm

It's hard to look confident sometimes when you go out alone. Try not to use your phone as a crutch...arrive early, sit at the bar. Hopefully there is music for you the vibe to as you slowly sip your drink. Talk to the bartender about anything to look approchable to others. Talk to the person next to you, just little light banter nothing heavy. If you are out on an odd weeknight...tell folks it's your birthday week, and you are doing it big every day! Make sure you know your zodiac signs...LOL

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Permalink Reply by GetEmGirl on March 27, 2008 at 9:55pm

I read this post and I got immediately stressed out! LOL and I go out alone often...I think if someone needs a set of rules, they shouldnt go out alone. Perhaps, they are the type to hang with others and that is okay too...no sense in being alone and uncomfortable...

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Permalink Reply by CocoDiva81 on March 27, 2008 at 10:29pm

I find it a little difficult to go out solo. Probably has something to do with the places I go but the men are vultures. They go so hard...It's ridiculous sometimes. When I go out alone to mixed bars it's a little more relaxed but all-black bars it's like Animal House. Sometimes I go out to get a drink and some ambiance, but they come one after the other and a lot of the times I get trolls before the fine ones so you know I have straight attitude. Maybe it's just like that in FL? Miami is cool but places like Tampa, Orlando, it's a hassle.

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Permalink Reply by CocoDiva81 on March 27, 2008 at 10:30pm

I find it a little difficult to go out solo. Probably has something to do with the places I go but the men are vultures. They go so hard...It's ridiculous sometimes. When I go out alone to mixed bars it's a little more relaxed but all-black bars it's like Animal House. Sometimes I go out to get a drink and some ambiance, but they come one after the other and a lot of the times I get trolls before the fine ones so you know I have straight attitude. Maybe it's just like that in FL? Miami is cool but places like Tampa, Orlando, it's a hassle.

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Permalink Reply by MsTrouble on March 28, 2008 at 2:07am

I stress out when I go out alone....I'm afraid I'll look all pressed. But usually I get free drinks, so it turns out well most times. Some of my girls be like...I don't know how you do it. Cabin fever takes it's toll sometimes and I gotta get a taste of the night life.

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Permalink Reply by Le Coquette on March 28, 2008 at 9:12am

I go out by myself all the time. I personally text people and check emails to look busy at first. I do that when I have a free moment anyway so it's not like I am doing something out of character. I don't absorb myself in it. But just enough to be busy but still approachable. When someone sends me a drink or approaches me, checking the phone stops and I give that person my attention unless I am not interested. They get the hint either way.

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Permalink Reply by Honeycoated on March 28, 2008 at 11:26am

I agree. I think I would do better in a sportsbar type setting where they have flatscreens and while I'm not "acting busy" with my phone, lol, I can at least act like i'm interested in whatever game is on. And then, while I'm at the bar I can order a drink and an appetizer or something.

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Permalink Reply by Charlie/Daddy's Girl on March 30, 2008 at 8:28pm

I love going out by myself, I have more fun and i meet the most interesting people...I always get approached by guys saying they loved my confidence to come out alone...or they think its sexy that I don't run with a crew.

Take a book, it ALWAYS starts convo...get a balckberry, you do a bunch of "busy work" on there...and learn to love your own company...start going to lunch alone, when you're out shopping - it will build your confidence to be alone at a restuarant...

I go on vacations alone...and always have a ball

P.S. NEVER EVER cross your hands over your chest, you will look unapproachable

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Permalink Reply by Caramel Tasty on March 30, 2008 at 10:57pm

That's true!! I agree with Cassandra. If you really depend on somebody a majority of the time for fun, then you might always be dolo!!

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Permalink Reply by Le Coquette on March 31, 2008 at 9:43am

I have never gone on vacation alone before but i think i will this year. Maybe Vegas. I do feel going out alone can be rather dangerous. Men usually do ask where my friends are. I usually say somewhere else in the club. In the past I have made friends with the bouncers or door people prior to going solo so that someone keeps an eye out. You can never be too safe.

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