I was in the bed with my man, and told him about a girlfriend of mine that was cheating. We were drunk, and I was pillow talking. We have sobered up, and he told me he didn't want me around my friend, because she is a bad influence. Please help!

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when you dish dirt about your GF's one of two things usually happens - 1. your man will begin to wonder if you indulge in improper activities also, or 2. he will try to hit, to see if she is as nasty as you say she is... Sometimes both things happen...

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So are all of his friends 100% faithful and if not does he plan to stop hanging with them as well? I would tell him that I am a grown woman who is quite capable in determining who I should and should not hang around, and that I am not as easily influenced as he may believe.......I wish a dude would try to tell me to cut one of my girls back, that shit sounds silly to me.

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Are you sure he's not cheating with her? LOL!

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I hope you learn from this. Don't tell your man about your girl bed habits and don't tell your girl about your man's bed habit. Don't bring up gossip with your man. Find something else to talk about. Try to learn as much about each other and not others... Now you have your man thinking. If he has to tell you not to be around your friend, he isn't thinking something nice. Birds of a feather do flock together. If your friend is a "bad" person, he is wondering why are you with her. And you listen to him as well. If he has too many "bad" friends... But men don't really do this, because they know the deal. I am in no way a grimey female. But my man was not doing so well at one point. And he was downing a friend because he thought the friend could do better, but he also was trying to make himself look good. But his friend's ethics were better than his. So, you know I was thinking about the friend. I found his ethics to be sexy. I felt bad, but he was telling me alot about him. But I would never act. But not everyone is the same. You understand what I'm talking about... Then he can also be thinking ya'll ain't "that" cool, depending on how you were talking. And if a man can get in, he will. Men judge us on what we talk about. And if it's too much my friend did this my friend did that, he will become curious. This is where women mess up, doing this will only introduce your friend(s) to your man without the intro. You already unconsciously hooked them up.

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How close are you and your man? I mean, is it serious? Do you think he's worth dropin a homie over? Is he sweatin you to drop your girl? Maybe if you don't give him an answer he'll forget and move on...lol.

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My question is, Would he do the same for you?? If you didn't like one of his friends.

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Girlfriends are influenced by each other. Believe it or not. If you and your man are going through something, and you call your friend and she tells you to fuck em and go and find another "friend", the majority of females will do just that, because it's common. "Fuck em girl" is a common cliche. And us women don't want to look like the fool. This is why so many females are on Maury with several BD because they have the wrong friend(s). We all heard the line, "we broke up that week". Within that week, homegirl has over 3 possiblities?? I am the voice of reason. I don't have any BFFs because that is a cliche to me. I associate with a few unfavorable chicks, nothing major though. But I don't make it a habit, because like I said, girlfriends are influenced by each other. I'm not saying this is your situation, but this is a common scenario with us

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I can answer for her...HELL NO he won't drop his homie for her.

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How old are you SoulGlo? And how long have you been with this male?

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I have been with him for years, and I still haven't talked to my friend.

Tab said:
How old are you SoulGlo? And how long have you been with this male?

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It is a double standard. His boy can fuck half of the United States and he isn't gonna drop him for anything. But, and we've had this discussion before, be very careful what you tell your man. Now that the damage is done, you will simply need to keep the two of them apart. You can still hang with your girl and go shopping, but I wouldn't be flaunting her up in his face for the two reasons JustMe stated. Just wait, give it some time and when she gets into a good solid relationship, try reintroducing her to your social scene and events that include your man. You don't want to give him the impression that birds of a feather flock together so ease up off of him on this one and see her on your own time.

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He doesnt want you around her, you stopped talking to her. What do you need help with? It doesnt seem to me that she was a close friend or you would have put up some type of resistance. Obviously you want to please your man more then you want to keep that friendship. There isnt anythng wrong w/ that,pick your battles if it isnt worth it let it go.


SoulGlo said:
I have been with him for years, and I still haven't talked to my friend.

Tab said:
How old are you SoulGlo? And how long have you been with this male?

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