So here it is people, I've been dating this man on and off for a few years (more off than on) and recently HE brought up the subject of us having children. When asked why he wants that with me, he basically said because he knows I would be a "good babymother." Now nothing against all of the babymothers out there but thats not the path I want my life to take. I want to be Wife NOT wifey, babymama, bust-it-baby, bottom bitch or whatever and I let him know that. His response? "You can be more." Im confused, he's a gorgeous chocolate man with dimples, bow-legs and a six-figure salary...I have my life in order, financially, emotionally, etc But I do not want to waste my time with a man thats only looking for a babymother. Shoud I ride this out and see where it goes or shoud I cut my ties and move on with my life? Thanks in advance for your opinions...

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Damn.........you can be with him and have other friends on the side. Since he already told you what he wanted, dont try to change his mind. Talk to other guys, who knows what might happen. Don't be deseperate and settle for less, if you want to be WIFE,

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String him along and see how it goes, who knows he may change his mind and want you to be his wife, but don't settle it's your body and choice

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aaaww heell naww... yall can be friends. its obvious he's not looking for anything more.

the only way i am having a kid for anyone is if i am the WIFE.

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I think you should have this talk with him again before you decide to call it quits. Don't just walk away!!!

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how long have yall been together?? and u stated you guys have been more off than on , so maybe he looks at you as good friend. I know that want their children to have some qualities as their female friends but dont want to wife him. Have u guys even discussed stabilizing your relationship first? You can let him know you guys need to work from there and you can even toss his "idea" by stating that you would want to make sure you guys have a healthy relationship before bringing a child into the mix.

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Maybe he was testing you???

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Dating On and off for the past 5 years but we recently made it excusive. Really recent. Then he hit me with "ok im ready for kids now"...Im thinking I may just keep my options open

ReMLoVE said:
how long have yall been together?? and u stated you guys have been more off than on , so maybe he looks at you as good friend. I know that want their children to have some qualities as their female friends but dont want to wife him. Have u guys even discussed stabilizing your relationship first? You can let him know you guys need to work from there and you can even toss his "idea" by stating that you would want to make sure you guys have a healthy relationship before bringing a child into the mix.

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i think it is a test. he's trying to see what you will settle for

Noisy_Girl...2 said:
Maybe he was testing you???

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Hmmm I didnt consider that...its possible

NYNaturalBeauty said:
i think it is a test. he's trying to see what you will settle for

Noisy_Girl...2 said:
Maybe he was testing you???

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put your foot down and tell him you're ready to jump the broom.

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Great idea!

Don't settle for it this way if this is not what you want.



Lovely said:
Dating On and off for the past 5 years but we recently made it excusive. Really recent. Then he hit me with "ok im ready for kids now"...Im thinking I may just keep my options open

ReMLoVE said:
how long have yall been together?? and u stated you guys have been more off than on , so maybe he looks at you as good friend. I know that want their children to have some qualities as their female friends but dont want to wife him. Have u guys even discussed stabilizing your relationship first? You can let him know you guys need to work from there and you can even toss his "idea" by stating that you would want to make sure you guys have a healthy relationship before bringing a child into the mix.

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I did..in a way lol. I told him in order for me to consider having kids with anyone, I need to be Wife first...his response was "ok, you can be more" a kiss and a smile..im like huh? lol. I refuse to bring the subject up again tho, when he does then we'll speak on it. In the meantime i'll just bring my own condoms :)

Noisy_Girl...2 said:
put your foot down and tell him you're ready to jump the broom.

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