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Permalink Reply by maxwells_musze on April 16, 2012 at 9:31am

i just had a baby at 38. if i had to do it over again, i probably would've waited even longer but don't lie to yourself time is not on woman's side. having children is a young woman's game, though i was in no way ready to have a baby 10 or really even 5 years ago.

 

you have this dream job and about to be a newlywed. take it slow. i would suggest you wait at least 2 more years. enjoy married life and congratulations!

 

p.s. to the person to knows the ins and outs of finding a nanny. you could certainly help me find someone that won't cost me a major organ and an arm, speaks english and won't steal my underwear. please. and. thanks!

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Permalink Reply by Phoenix on April 16, 2012 at 9:49am

+1

I nearly lost my mind staying home with my daughter the first 6 months.

And don't think of the daycare as someone else raising your child. YOU (above all) are irreplaceable. You will carry that baby, the baby knows who mommy is.

Think of daycare as school. The child will be learning key social skills very early. Instead of being cooped up in the house and socially awkward from being with mommy all day everyday. This will also help when baby #2 comes along. 

I yearned for adult interaction when i was home with my daughter. And as much as it hurt to leave her, i knew it was best for both of us. You'll be making her/his life much easier by having a dual income. Trips and such, the best of everything. 

Still Pretty Vahn said:

Who would want to stay at home 24/7 with a baby or kid???? I love my son n I love being a mom.. n I work at home now so when. He doesn't have school.. were home all day unless I find us something to do.. but even when he was a baby..i worked 8hrs a day.. n my mom kept him.. I still spent time with him .. he love me n I love him.. being a parent is a sacrifice but its not that serious... cuz once ur child is In school at 3or4 then what?? U still gone be a stay at home mom?? I worked 14hr days everyday when my son was 2 for a year.. he still loves me n I taught him his ABC to count to 10 his first n last name..ect...we also took a vacation that year as well as went to the park..bday patties n whatever else... my mom had to take him to some things while I worked but the point is he never missed out on anything.. no raise him on my own... no money no thing.. I do it.. so if I can do it a married woman sure can too... if she really wants a child...

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Permalink Reply by OLD $PICE PINE NEEDLE on April 16, 2012 at 9:59am

lol

maxwells_musze said:

i just had a baby at 38. if i had to do it over again, i probably would've waited even longer but don't lie to yourself time is not on woman's side. having children is a young woman's game, though i was in no way ready to have a baby 10 or really even 5 years ago.

 

you have this dream job and about to be a newlywed. take it slow. i would suggest you wait at least 2 more years. enjoy married life and congratulations!

 

p.s. to the person to knows the ins and outs of finding a nanny. you could certainly help me find someone that won't cost me a major organ and an arm, speaks english and won't steal my underwear. please. and. thanks!

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Permalink Reply by Ms. BoiBye on April 16, 2012 at 12:09pm

I breast feed my daughter until she was 15 months old (not out of my breast, but from milk that I had pumped and kept frozen) so she never tasted similac. I went back to work because damn near lost my mind after the first 2 months. I needed adult stimulation so bad, LOL.  If you do decide to take a short leave of absence you will feel guilty once you go back to work, but it doesn't make you a bad mom. At the end of the day the choice is one that you have to weigh out the pros and cons for. I wish I could give you more advice, but it is never a right or wrong time to have a baby. It will always be something, so just get knocked up and enjoy your new family, LOL.

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Permalink Reply by MS. UCAN NEVA GET ENUFF!! on April 16, 2012 at 12:39pm

Was it hard for you to lose weight?
 
maxwells_musze said:

i just had a baby at 38. if i had to do it over again, i probably would've waited even longer but don't lie to yourself time is not on woman's side. having children is a young woman's game, though i was in no way ready to have a baby 10 or really even 5 years ago.

 

you have this dream job and about to be a newlywed. take it slow. i would suggest you wait at least 2 more years. enjoy married life and congratulations!

 

p.s. to the person to knows the ins and outs of finding a nanny. you could certainly help me find someone that won't cost me a major organ and an arm, speaks english and won't steal my underwear. please. and. thanks!

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Permalink Reply by blackfujones on April 16, 2012 at 12:45pm

some common ground has to be met.Its both you and your future husbands choice, I know one side will be hurt if that common ground isnt reached

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Permalink Reply by maxwells_musze on April 16, 2012 at 3:18pm

it was not hard at all. and i gained nearly 40lbs!!! i am now smaller than my pre-pregnancy weight which i seriously contribute to breast feeding and also running around like a chicken w/its head cut off trying to do all i used to do AND take care of a baby. i wanted so badly to look ginormously pregnant but really only got a fat face and all belly.

 

now i am grateful i didn't blow up because otherwise, i'd be still wearing maternity clothes. my husband is glad too;)

 

thinking of daycare as school is all that i had to keep me from in my mind making it out to be jail! LOL! i am not one of these people that need adult stimulation and dying to get back to work. though i like my job enough and am nearly fulfilled in my field. i would much rather prefer to be home. everyone isn't the same though.

MS. UCAN NEVA GET ENUFF!! said:

Was it hard for you to lose weight?
 
maxwells_musze said:

i just had a baby at 38. if i had to do it over again, i probably would've waited even longer but don't lie to yourself time is not on woman's side. having children is a young woman's game, though i was in no way ready to have a baby 10 or really even 5 years ago.

 

you have this dream job and about to be a newlywed. take it slow. i would suggest you wait at least 2 more years. enjoy married life and congratulations!

 

p.s. to the person to knows the ins and outs of finding a nanny. you could certainly help me find someone that won't cost me a major organ and an arm, speaks english and won't steal my underwear. please. and. thanks!

• ▶ Reply

Permalink Reply by Still Pretty V on April 16, 2012 at 3:38pm

If u can work a normal 9-5 mom - Fri then that's perfect!! Me n my son r very close... idk y y'all think the first 2 years are important...they will walk n talk the rest of there lives!! My son won't shut up.. lol I mean if ur schedule is 15 hrs a day then yea I understand y u wouldn't want one... but how will it change In 2yrs

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Permalink Reply by Creative Bee on April 16, 2012 at 9:33pm

I don't want to be stay at home mom, I love my job and love being productive, BUT a child would be the biggest project :) You know ladies I have issues with daycares, first years of life are very important in human development and knowledgeable parent can set strong ground for a future and daycares cannot provide as much attention as a mother could, I wouldn't mind leaving for 2-3 hours for socializing with other kids, but for the whole day, that would be a lot of missed moments. Anyways, thank you for responses, I think I'll wait for a year or two and then see if I can convince my job for a part time, or work form home opportunity. 

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Permalink Reply by MS. UCAN NEVA GET ENUFF!! on April 16, 2012 at 10:38pm

IT IS...Im studying early childhood right now
 
Still Pretty Vahn said:

If u can work a normal 9-5 mom - Fri then that's perfect!! Me n my son r very close... idk y y'all think the first 2 years are important...they will walk n talk the rest of there lives!! My son won't shut up.. lol I mean if ur schedule is 15 hrs a day then yea I understand y u wouldn't want one... but how will it change In 2yrs

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Permalink Reply by OLD $PICE PINE NEEDLE on April 16, 2012 at 10:59pm

The first 5 years

Creative Bee said:

I don't want to be stay at home mom, I love my job and love being productive, BUT a child would be the biggest project :) You know ladies I have issues with daycares, first years of life are very important in human development and knowledgeable parent can set strong ground for a future and daycares cannot provide as much attention as a mother could, I wouldn't mind leaving for 2-3 hours for socializing with other kids, but for the whole day, that would be a lot of missed moments. Anyways, thank you for responses, I think I'll wait for a year or two and then see if I can convince my job for a part time, or work form home opportunity. 

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Permalink Reply by Still Pretty V on April 16, 2012 at 11:51pm

I don't believe the books... as a mother I know first hand... but just my opinion... its not that serious... n it can be done.. my son is spoils n get plenty of attention.. at school home n whereever... my son is the smartest n his class been reading.g since he was 3 by himself..n m a single parent n I also worked full time n when to school... but everyone is different n raise there children differently

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