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Permalink Reply by OLD $PICE PINE NEEDLE on August 1, 2012 at 1:40pm

I agree with her, take that to the grave with you. They don't need to know what went on in  your past relationships. If more than one man that hurt you he'll say hmmm...there is a pattern here lol

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Permalink Reply by luvsmoochez on August 1, 2012 at 1:56pm

I agree that you shouldn't tell, but not because he will think you are bitter, but he may start thinking about what his ass could get away with. IJS

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Permalink Reply by Bonita on August 1, 2012 at 2:03pm

I have to agree. It shows that you may not be over the situation yet and will be bringing hurt into the new situation. 

Every time guys ask about my past..I breeze thru that question stating that most of my relationships ended amicably and I wish them nothing but the best. If he continues to ask I confirm that there is no hurt there and while the past shapes the future it is only in a positive manner via growth. By that point he should have no more questions.

I try not to ask about his past my standard questions are just if he has kids and if he has ever cheated or been cheated on. The way he answers will tell me his mental state.

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Permalink Reply by Tone © on August 1, 2012 at 2:13pm

  Think about it ladies you tell a man that your ex  never gave you anything nice.  So a man is going to think hey her ex  got to  have sex with her and he did nothing so why should i do more then him.

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Permalink Reply by Dragon Slayer Puss on August 1, 2012 at 2:14pm

Yea, IMO, it brands a female as hurt or jaded. He may think that you "aint used to a good man" or you have some "emotional" issues. Even if you try to diffuse his thoughts, you will fail miserably, and at the end of the day he will think what the hell he wants.

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Permalink Reply by Baller Alert on August 1, 2012 at 2:29pm

MMMMmmm..interesting answers.

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Permalink Reply by University of Smitty on August 1, 2012 at 2:30pm

I agree.  I think it's ignorant of men to think like that but hey.....they cant help it.

Tone said:

  Think about it ladies you tell a man that your ex  never gave you anything nice.  So a man is going to think hey her ex  got to  have sex with her and he did nothing so why should i do more then him.

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Permalink Reply by DdoubleD on August 1, 2012 at 2:38pm

This is so true.  You don't want to appear bitter.  The best thing any woman can do is forgive her ex and move on.  Not for them, but for your own self.  There is no reason to hold to the hurt and the pain.  More importantly, don't let next man know you been through it with your ex.  Worry about your future not your past! 

Bonita said:

I have to agree. It shows that you may not be over the situation yet and will be bringing hurt into the new situation. 

Every time guys ask about my past..I breeze thru that question stating that most of my relationships ended amicably and I wish them nothing but the best. If he continues to ask I confirm that there is no hurt there and while the past shapes the future it is only in a positive manner via growth. By that point he should have no more questions.

I try not to ask about his past my standard questions are just if he has kids and if he has ever cheated or been cheated on. The way he answers will tell me his mental state.

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Permalink Reply by Tone © on August 1, 2012 at 3:13pm

it works both ways because if u tell a man u are use to a lavish life he. Will have to match it.
University of Smitty said:

I agree.  I think it's ignorant of men to think like that but hey.....they cant help it.

Tone said:

  Think about it ladies you tell a man that your ex  never gave you anything nice.  So a man is going to think hey her ex  got to  have sex with her and he did nothing so why should i do more then him.

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Permalink Reply by MissMidwest on August 1, 2012 at 3:18pm

I don't think you should share stories about your past with your present, period. If any discussions do arise about previous relationships, you should always speak selectively, nonchalantly, and semi-truthfully. What I mean by semi-truthfully is this; when you're in a job interview and your potential employer asks you why you left your previous job, are you going to haul off in a long-winded, expletive laced rant about how your former boss was an incompetent a****** with an inferiority complex, your coworkers were lazy ass whores who f***** your other coworkers in the utility closet, and that you hated the place so much that you half-assed everything while you were there because you knew you could get away with it? NO! You're going to hold back all the negativity you have built up from all the b******* you went through at your previous job and tell your potential employer some s*** like "as much as I enjoyed my previous position, I am ready and excited for a new, more challenging career" while smiling confidently.

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Permalink Reply by OLD $PICE PINE NEEDLE on August 1, 2012 at 3:51pm

LOL, u went iiiiiiiiin

MissMidwest said:

I don't think you should share stories about your past with your present, period. If any discussions do arise about previous relationships, you should always speak selectively, nonchalantly, and semi-truthfully. What I mean by semi-truthfully is this; when you're in a job interview and your potential employer asks you why you left your previous job, are you going to haul off in a long-winded, expletive laced rant about how your former boss was an incompetent a****** with an inferiority complex, your coworkers were lazy ass whores who f***** your other coworkers in the utility closet, and that you hated the place so much that you half-assed everything while you were there because you knew you could get away with it? NO! You're going to hold back all the negativity you have built up from all the b******* you went through at your previous job and tell your potential employer some s*** like "as much as I enjoyed my previous position, I am ready and excited for a new, more challenging career" while smiling confidently.

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Permalink Reply by BabyBallerCheeks on August 1, 2012 at 4:02pm

I agree. A friend of mines was physically abused by three different men. At first I thought it was just bad luck but then I realized, she would tell each one of them what she had endured with the last so, when they got angry, they just followed suit. I told her to NEVER tell any man she use to get beat ever again. 

I mean, think about it this way. A man comes to you and says, "I bought my ex girl a car, paid all her bills, took her shopping on the regular...etc." Aren't you going to expect the same? Now, if that same man said he caught his girl cheating but still paid her bills because he loved her, wouldn't you feel like you could use him too? 

Pass behavior is an indication of future behavior. Don't share your war stories with your new boo unless you want them to throw it in your face or do the same later.

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