Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by Golden Child on September 28, 2010 at 10:24am

How old are you? Do you have any female friends? I'm really not too good at explaining but I'll do my best, but I need more info.

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Permalink Reply by OfficialGroupie on September 28, 2010 at 5:00pm

tip #1: search the archives

tip#2: if your questions have not been addressed, repost your questions.

good luck! happy searching!

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Permalink Reply by Candy on September 28, 2010 at 6:56pm

That avatar is killing me....that's all :)

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Permalink Reply by BabyCakes on September 28, 2010 at 8:38pm

I'm 21, I have a few female friends but all of them are in the same boat as me kinda

I will do some more searching on this site too, I read a few blogs that helped me out

Golden Child said:

How old are you? Do you have any female friends? I'm really not too good at explaining but I'll do my best, but I need more info.

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Permalink Reply by MS. UCAN NEVA GET ENUFF!! on September 29, 2010 at 12:54am

There probably hasnt been many responses because this is a never-ending topic..Ive only been a mem ber for maybe a gd year and ive seen this topic many times, and when going through the archives, many, many, more times...just sit down and go back and im sure youll find a LOT of topics that would help you tremendously (sp?) read all the old blogs/post by Cass and Getem Girl

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Permalink Reply by Zaria 22 on September 30, 2010 at 8:34pm

Girl keep strolling the ballerboards. That's how I started picking up stuff. You can sort the boards by newest discussion etc. I mean there is no one way to meet a man. It depends on 1. The type of man you want to meet whether athlete, corp baller, d-boy, etc. 2. the type of woman YOU are (groupie, gold digger, or just a real women that wants a successful man) 3. where you live (major city, small town, can you travel?)
I mean if you really want to do this, get books like how to marry rich, vixen manuals etc. Search engines with key words like how to get a rich man. My best advice is to always be about yourself. Get your own first. Cause it's 2010. and dudes out here are hip to gold diggers. There is nothing wrong with being a woman who wants a successful man, but think about this successful man. Does he want a girl like you? D boys, and dudes like that are temporary set ups. You might get some money out of it for little shopping @ Bebe and food, and bills money, and ish like that, but if you want real money, s*** that appraises, and money that you can invest, and business start ups and s*** like that, that's a whole-nother ball game, and you gona have to do your research. It's work! Don't forget that. It literally is a job. Ever seen Paula Patton in Just wright? You have to devote time and energy into it if this is you MAIN Goal. You are going to have to become the man you want to get. You gota know all the s*** he know. Cause a man with real money wants a woman that is smart next to him. Someone who will be an assest, not a liability.
1. You gota be a hottie. Like a real hottie. Keep your nails, toes, hair done. No hair on your body. Smell good all the time (no cheap smells either)
2. Dress like you got money. You may need to invest in a quality handbag and shoes. You can't attract money if you don't smell like it. It requires and initial investment
3. Upgrade the types of places you hang out. Upscale Hotels and hotel bars, upscale restaurants and steakhouses, VIP section in the clubs, stadiums, Upscale malls (during the week during the day not on busy sat/sun)
4. Have your own thing going on. This should probably be number one. B/c dudes run away from girls that seem needy and dependent. If you already have a designer bag, he won't think you NEED him to get another one when you ask. If you already shop all the time, he won't think you NEED his credit card when you ready to hit the mall. The key is getting him to WANT to give you things. Not feel sorry for you. You don't want his pity. You want his HEART. Don't ever be shy about the fact you don't have what he has. This is great! if you seem content and happy driving your honda, he will delight in bringing a smile to your face when he gives you the keys to the range. Always take care of yourself and be a kept woman. Remember, men fall in love with their eyes. He needs to see that you always look right. Even in your sweats (which should be juicy btw...or Victoria's secret sweats are a good start up.)
5. patience...sometimes it takes a while with this strategy. But i'm in it for the long run. This is just my tactic. My game. Everybody has their own way of doing things. And in time you will find yours. I tend to deal with professional types and corp. ballers so this works for me. I mean you can always do the quick fix schemes and try escorting, stripping, etc. Stripping is not all that bad. I know alot of girls who meet ballers this way. However, none of them married to one, or got their heart.
Good Luck on your search for the riches!!

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Permalink Reply by Zaria 22 on September 30, 2010 at 8:39pm

PS....Dont give it up too soon and you win. Men like a chase. Always...Don't give it up until you are in a committed relationship with the dude. If he's really hott and doing what he supposed to do (buying you s***, taking you out etc.) then you can give it up in three months. This is 90 days of constant dating and staying in touch. Not him in town one week then disappear the next. He needs to court you for three solid months. Especially if he's an athlete. If he's an athlete don't give it up at all. they get it all the time. You will be put on a pedestal for being a "good girl" and classy lady for holding out on the Kat.



Zaria 22 said:

Girl keep strolling the ballerboards. That's how I started picking up stuff. You can sort the boards by newest discussion etc. I mean there is no one way to meet a man. It depends on 1. The type of man you want to meet whether athlete, corp baller, d-boy, etc. 2. the type of woman YOU are (groupie, gold digger, or just a real women that wants a successful man) 3. where you live (major city, small town, can you travel?)
I mean if you really want to do this, get books like how to marry rich, vixen manuals etc. Search engines with key words like how to get a rich man. My best advice is to always be about yourself. Get your own first. Cause it's 2010. and dudes out here are hip to gold diggers. There is nothing wrong with being a woman who wants a successful man, but think about this successful man. Does he want a girl like you? D boys, and dudes like that are temporary set ups. You might get some money out of it for little shopping @ Bebe and food, and bills money, and ish like that, but if you want real money, s*** that appraises, and money that you can invest, and business start ups and s*** like that, that's a whole-nother ball game, and you gona have to do your research. It's work! Don't forget that. It literally is a job. Ever seen Paula Patton in Just wright? You have to devote time and energy into it if this is you MAIN Goal. You are going to have to become the man you want to get. You gota know all the s*** he know. Cause a man with real money wants a woman that is smart next to him. Someone who will be an assest, not a liability.
1. You gota be a hottie. Like a real hottie. Keep your nails, toes, hair done. No hair on your body. Smell good all the time (no cheap smells either)
2. Dress like you got money. You may need to invest in a quality handbag and shoes. You can't attract money if you don't smell like it. It requires and initial investment
3. Upgrade the types of places you hang out. Upscale Hotels and hotel bars, upscale restaurants and steakhouses, VIP section in the clubs, stadiums, Upscale malls (during the week during the day not on busy sat/sun)
4. Have your own thing going on. This should probably be number one. B/c dudes run away from girls that seem needy and dependent. If you already have a designer bag, he won't think you NEED him to get another one when you ask. If you already shop all the time, he won't think you NEED his credit card when you ready to hit the mall. The key is getting him to WANT to give you things. Not feel sorry for you. You don't want his pity. You want his HEART. Don't ever be shy about the fact you don't have what he has. This is great! if you seem content and happy driving your honda, he will delight in bringing a smile to your face when he gives you the keys to the range. Always take care of yourself and be a kept woman. Remember, men fall in love with their eyes. He needs to see that you always look right. Even in your sweats (which should be juicy btw...or Victoria's secret sweats are a good start up.)
5. patience...sometimes it takes a while with this strategy. But i'm in it for the long run. This is just my tactic. My game. Everybody has their own way of doing things. And in time you will find yours. I tend to deal with professional types and corp. ballers so this works for me. I mean you can always do the quick fix schemes and try escorting, stripping, etc. Stripping is not all that bad. I know alot of girls who meet ballers this way. However, none of them married to one, or got their heart.
Good Luck on your search for the riches!!

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Permalink Reply by Ms. Ashley Banks on October 1, 2010 at 5:36pm

I like very educated men, they typically don't have a lot of money but other women clamor to marry them so they can be the wife of professor so-and-so, Dr. so-and-so. Sometimes, they're generous, sometimes they're not. I've dated two corporate officers, and have had a high-ranking military officer court me. I can tell you EVERYTHING you can do wrong.

1) READ READ READ-study this like you're being graded on it. My foolishness has cost me many a sweet deal. Read Why Men Love B******, and Why Men Marry B******. These two books will open your eyes. The type of set up you want will more than likely not lead to a long term affair. BUT if you want it to, don't cling to him and make him think he'll be taking care of you for the rest of your life. Honestly, just read period.

2) WORK THE ASSETS YOU HAVE AND DON'T PUT YOURSELF DOWN IN FRONT OF HIM. I'm no Ms. America, but I work with what the Lord gave me. I'm overweight and have a very average face, I'll never let him know that I hate the way I look. I always dress in the best way that I can. I have a few sexy assets, I play those up when I go out with a man. I don't own many expensive outfits, or handbags or shoes, but I do have quality pieces that don't scream "LABEL WHORE". Same for your hair, don't go with what's popular, be versatile yet classy. You want to stand out, not blend in. If every woman in the room has a head full of shiny jet black Indian hair, red-soled platforms, denim leggings, a monogram LV bag, why would you want the same thing? I kid you not, I've been able to get the attention of men just because I wasn't dressed like the other women. I also always wear pearls and carry vintage clutches and evening bags, I collect them, and when men remember the thing that stands out about you, they'll probably give it to you as a gift. I have a gorgeous Mikimoto necklace that I would never be able to afford on my own, but a Ph.D. student was in Japan and saw it, and thought of me, and brought it home with him.

3) DO NOT GIVE A GIFT BACK-even if it's really expensive and the guy threatens to sue you, if the item is that crucial, let him take you to court. 9 times out of 10, they won't want to deal with the humiliation of it being on paper. I had a very pretty Chanel bag that I picked out at a thrift store in Michigan while with an executive I was dating. Turned out the bag was worth a few hundred dollars, not a big deal. What was a big deal is that when we broke up, he said he wanted everything back, and I gave him that bag. Turns out a relative that used to be a domestic had some original Chanel packaging from that time period, I could have sold the purse, with that packaging, on ebay and made about a thousand dollars. Me thinking I was showing how independent I was, and how I didn't need any reminders of him, cost me some money. The gifts he gives you can come in handy later. If you don't sell them, you can use them to attract more men. The pearls I mentioned above have been a great conversation starter for me. When women compliment me on them, I tell them they were a gift from a relative in Japan, he was a student working in Japan. We start talking about Japan, I tell them how I've always wanted to visit, some older gentleman usually dips into the conversation and next thing you know, Mr. Divorced Father of Five is my newest companion. I doubt I'll get more expensive pearls out of that man, but free golf lessons, weekend trips, textbooks, dinners, breakfasts, etc. Yesterday's gifts will open doors tomorrow.

4) KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT- I come from a very close knit family and we blab blab blab to one another. I had to learn the hard way to not do that with men. I discovered some men were being generous with me out of pity, not because they wanted to shower me with gifts because I was witty, sexy, and oh so cute. They didn't want to shower me with gifts just because, they wanted me to be dependant on them. Men like that will dictate your life, try to change you, relocate you, separate you from others with money. These men are often corporate guys that date true hoodrats, not the girls from the hood trying to make it, the girl that can't imagine getting out with her 3 kids. These men will throw you a few cheap outfits, take you to the Cheesecake Factory, fix your car (not help you clean up your credit to get a new one, or buy you a new one). I have a raggedy car, I love my car, I have a very emotional attachment to the item that helped me pack up and leave a man that was beating me, helped me get away from another sticky situation, and it's the first thing I purchased with my own money. Men know I'm proud of my car, they don't ask why, I don't tell them why. When they give me money for repairs, they're also trying to find a way to get me out of the car with the fading paint and loud A/C. If you have a problem, don't tell them. If he's into you and wants to take care of you, even outside of a relationship, he will take care of things. Now, this only works with men you treat like a boyfriend or are in a real relationship with. Don't complain about your health, don't complain about flunking out of school, don't complain about possibly being fired from your job. Topical problems that he can see (raggedy car, TV on the fritz), he will notice those things and take care of them for you.

5) ANY FINANCIAL ARRANGEMENT IS AN ALLOWANCE, NOT A SALARY: Stupid me could have moved to Miami on someone else's dime. I'm perfectly capable of getting a job, planned on getting one, and wanted to go back to school. The military officer I was seeing had just retired from the Army and was going to be a consultant for a big military contractor. He was getting PAID and was feeling extremely generous. We discussed my predicament, could I afford to live in Miami and go to school while working full-time. He offered to help me out, said to think it over, and figure out how much it would cost for me to move, he'd take care of the move and anything else. When I went to visit him, drunk on good sex and sunshine, he asked me how much would I need to survive. I did complain that the rent I was looking at was twice what I was paying in Texas, and my tuition would be out of state for six months and eat most of my salary, so he said how much. A smart girl would have said, some help with my rent would be great, because he would have paid my rent. My dumbass said, "a few thousand a month would be good, like 3 or 4". I was being greedy. If you want that kind of money, you need more than one man. I wasn't a seasoned vet, had not had a long enough relationship with him to expect to be completely taken care of. Needless to say our relationship ended shortly after that, and he was less generous after that trip. I later learned from a seasoned pro (my mom) is to start small and DREAM BIG. Let them know how much harder you're working, how you're thriving. When you're happy, he's happy, and more likely to open his wallet.

And I'm sure I typed enough for today. Girl, I have so much I could tell you. I didn't realize that men were TRYING to take care of me for so long, I was young and stupid (hell, the last time was last year, so I wasn't so young). I've seen the light, so I don't want you to go through the heart ache and low funds I had to endure.

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Permalink Reply by desiree on October 1, 2010 at 7:19pm

damn! i'm eating this s*** up and I aint even the threadstarter lol
you ladies KNOW YOUR STUFF

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Permalink Reply by Honeycoated on October 1, 2010 at 8:31pm

Damn Ashley! You could write a book, or some blogs

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Permalink Reply by Ms. Ashley Banks on October 1, 2010 at 8:53pm

Sorry! I didn't mean to be so passionate, a regular guy that I like fell through on something and it pissed me off. Don't be a fool! That's all I can say.

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Permalink Reply by BabyCakes on October 4, 2010 at 11:37am

Wow I didnt expect this discussion to jump off the way it did..I am learning a lot and getting more confident in my goals because of this information

Zaria & Ashley Banks thank you x1034908!!

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