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Permalink Reply by DB on March 21, 2012 at 2:25pm

I HATE the grocery store for all of the reasons listed and then some!!!

1) do NOT let your bad ass kids touch every damn piece of fruit! Yes, I know people will wash them after they buy them but seriously, control your kids
2) old lady, please stop squeezing all the fruit and then putting it back.. That orange was probably ripe an firm until you damn near made Simply Orange with it
3) checkout lady, please tell the bagger to bag my damn groceries and quit talking to the customers like this is speed dating, If I wanted to bag my own s*** I'd go to self checkout
4) girl, why did you come in this bougie grocery store with those rollers/that scarf on your damn head!! Now I have to act extra prim and proper so these white people don't think we're related
5) I see you following me down every aisle so let me go down the "female aisle" and see how quick you leave me alone
6) no I don't remember where I picked this item up from, don't smack your lips at me cause your remedial ass can't look up the item and check the price
7) bad ass kids (again) stop running around the store and knocking s*** down.. You're making me nervous and I won't be able to stop my reflexes if you run a lil too close to my purse
Ugh.. 

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Permalink Reply by The Guardian Angel on March 21, 2012 at 3:06pm

LOL...thanks for the comic relief...it's needed.

 

Okay....lemme add a few

*note to the folks shopping in NYC, Westchester & Northen Jersey*

 

A) - Hey u!!!  Lazy #$%&.  That cart you let roll down the hill in the parking lot hit my vehicle & dinged it up.  C'mon stop being so triflin.  Put the damn cart back!!!!  Stop leaving it in the roadway. 

 

B) So are you really going to ignore the fact that there is such a thing as personal space?  Hmm..I'm entering my pin number, give me some damn room... back the f*^*! up.  Stop breathing down my neck ignorant ass.

 

c) Stop it, stop it, if you wanna make a profit.  99% of the time I'm tipping a single if you bag, but if I have no change, or I'm tapped out it's par for the course.  Do not shake your cup at me!  What???  And....????  Yeah, muchos gracias to you to boo boo.

 

D) Yes, I'm glad to see you again...hell no I'm not giving you a  hug (or a free feel).  Round up & secure the store papa, keep it pushin...smh

 

E)  Turn that muf&^%$# music down.  We are not in the club!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  Stop piping that mess all up & thru  with the extra bass!

 

F) Okay, so I'm in the hood store today, camera's & all.  So... if you know this why are you loudly asking me in aisle 5 to meet you at the checkout so you can sell me the use of the Food Stamp Card?????  Sighhhhhhh....C'mon......

 

G)  Yes, so Fairway & Wholefoods have a better selection, but that doesn't mean you bring down the realestate by yelling at your nanny & having your spoiled brood of children lay out in the center aisle.  Nobody can shop now (or at least get past to get what they want) and your still going strong with this entitlement attitude at the check out.  Plus your leaving nanny to discipline & she's tuned out 20 minutes ago.

 

 

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