Having a Baby Is the New Marriage

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Permalink Reply by Seductress on July 9, 2009 at 6:49pm

Halle has publicly come out and said on numerous occasions that she's not getting married again and I don't blame her she already had 2 marriages from hell. I don't think anybody should knock her. As for lala if Mello was not who he was and didn't have paper like he does she wouldn't have stuck around nor would she gave dropped that baby. Yall forget that she was engaged to Suga J back in the day and she dumped his ass for a ninja with much longer paper, Mello. So I take it that she'll accept it anyway that she can. I'm not knocking her tho, do ya thing La.

I think people especially black people in the public eye should actually get married though. 50% of black children are born out of wedlock maybe if these people would take the plunge other regular folk would follow suit. There is a black nuclear family in the whitehouse so maybe mainstream black America as well as black hollywood should consider following suit. Its time to bring back the strong black family yall.

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Permalink Reply by DON_JUAN on July 9, 2009 at 6:58pm

yea get married and headed for divorce court and less then a year. lol
or force themselves to stay together and be miserable like 95% of white families.

Seductress said:

Halle has publicly come out and said on numerous occasions that she's not getting married again and I don't blame her she already had 2 marriages from hell. I don't think anybody should knock her. As for lala if Mello was not who he was and didn't have paper like he does she wouldn't have stuck around nor would she gave dropped that baby. Yall forget that she was engaged to Suga J back in the day and she dumped his ass for a ninja with much longer paper, Mello. So I take it that she'll accept it anyway that she can. I'm not knocking her tho, do ya thing La.

I think people especially black people in the public eye should actually get married though. 50% of black children are born out of wedlock maybe if these people would take the plunge other regular folk would follow suit. There is a black nuclear family in the whitehouse so maybe mainstream black America as well as black hollywood should consider following suit. Its time to bring back the strong black family yall.

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Permalink Reply by L0vie D0vie on July 9, 2009 at 8:34pm

@Da_Don

Yea the white families stick it out just like Black families use to do! Look at where it has gotten us.. being a "babymama"! *smdh*

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Permalink Reply by DUVALBeauty on July 9, 2009 at 9:17pm

I gotta co-sign w/ you Boss. If you have been "engaged" over 5 years (Tiny since 01 & LaLa since 04) chances are your not getting married so you might as well drop some kids to secure your financial future. LOL!

Boss/MadamBA said:

These pre-nuptial agreements are so damn air tight. Dropping the baby seals the deal basically. Sad but true..lol

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Permalink Reply by C*u*t*e* on July 10, 2009 at 12:29am

Marriage doesn't mean that much in America anymore. It seems like having a baby now says that you're committed. It's our society. Just like my mentor use to tell me, "Once you start having sex with him he doesn't have to marry you". Now I honestly understand what she meant because you're suppose to consumate your marriage with sex but if you're already having sex and especially with a kid what's the point of it.

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Permalink Reply by LMS on July 10, 2009 at 12:29am

@seductress actually 73% of black children are born out of wedlock, while the numbers for whites is 23%.

@don Lmao!

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Permalink Reply by La India on July 10, 2009 at 2:12am

On Halle...we all know how she feels about marriage. That damn Eric Benet scorned that girl. She said she would never marry again. But she's aging and most likely wanted a baby before it was too late so she got what she wanted. She's prob worth more than him too so shes basically the baller in the deal...if she still has man issues and baggage. Why Marry Him? He's capable of cheating, men cheat on the baddest females. So F it...she's happy. Not like she would take his last name and be Halle Berry-"so n so". What else would she need his name on paper for?

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Permalink Reply by Cougar $pice on July 10, 2009 at 7:54am

LOL, ain't this the truth. And we on the outside looking in thinking some things wrong with us. We wonder why our marriages or families can't stay intact like theirs.

DA_DON said:

yea get married and headed for divorce court and less then a year. lol
or force themselves to stay together and be miserable like 95% of white families.

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Permalink Reply by ATown SouthernGal on July 10, 2009 at 11:21am

I agree I think black families should get married. If we can change the thinking on family and marriage society might become a little better. If you ever watch Maury(I know dumb show) damn near all the black guys are yelling she's a ho and that 's not my baby while most the white men are crying how they hope the baby is theres. We have got to find a way to change the years of oppression.

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Permalink Reply by mochagirl on July 10, 2009 at 11:39am

If that ain't the truth....most of those white dudes do not care that she slept with his brother/father/homie. They always praying that the baby is thiers.

ATown SouthernGal said:

I agree I think black families should get married. If we can change the thinking on family and marriage society might become a little better. If you ever watch Maury(I know dumb show) damn near all the black guys are yelling she's a ho and that 's not my baby while most the white men are crying how they hope the baby is theres. We have got to find a way to change the years of oppression.

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Permalink Reply by Babydoll on July 10, 2009 at 1:12pm

Black people need to grow up. I have never seen so many immature relationships in my life, and yes, I personally think that if you want to have a baby, but it's cool not to get married- I think THAT is immature. (Go to a sperm bank or something.) That goes for every race, but a lot (not all) black relationships suffer from this lax attitude toward marriage. It is almost taboo to be married nowadays, and that is awful.

These athletes/ballers act like they are such role models and they are not. They have great athletic ablitiy(great), might do some charity work(nice), but what about setting a new standard and get married! Show that it is possible to love and respect a woman... Sometimes they are the only men these young boys have to look up to.

Marriage isn't all about being romantic/passionate all the time, its about making a life with someone, during boring and exciting times. And a lot of people get married for the wrong reasons. And yes, sometimes a baby is not always the right reason to get married, but if that is the case, why are 73% of us having kids with someone we don't want to be with long term? That isn't okay.

Black people need to take pride in marriage again and not settle for BM or BD status, and I am so discouraged and disappointed in how many black people actually are settling.

Obviously people have been giving birth out of wed-lock since the beginning of time, but I think everyone can agree that it wasn't like how it is now. These men are disrespectful, and the woman are not holding men accountable anymore. I work with a majority of women, black and white. 90% of the woman have children. All of the white women are married. The black women? No manz in sight. Not cool. Coincidence?? Nope.

Being a babymom is not a silent movement I can get behind.

whoa-sorry/end of rant...I am just sick of negroes right now lol.....

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Permalink Reply by JustMe on July 12, 2009 at 4:36pm

For those of you that keep referring to how white people do things, I want to know how many white people do you know? Not that you work with, but really and truly know?
More white kids are born into wedlock, but how many grow up in happy homes which to me is what its really all about... as of 2008 40% of all marriages have ended in divorce (that does not include people that kill to get out)...
I grew up in a small town and in kindergarten most of my white classmates parents were married... by the time we went to the big side (5th grade) a lot of those marriages were hanging on by a thread,and by the time we went to high school (8th grade), some of those marriages had ended in divorce... Then you have the black kids, some of the mothers (including mine) were single mothers when we were in kindergarten, but were happily married by the time we got to the big side, and still married when we graduated high school... The difference is for alot of white people someone getting knocked up means a wedding is in the near future, (used to, not so much nowadays)... the kids go along to get along... But by the time the kid reaches puberty and sometimes earlier, these people realize they have nothing in common...
For us, unfortunately a baby out of wedlock means, well, nothing actually.
When we start stating statistics & numbers, we forget about reality... Which is you don't want to spend the rest of your life with every dude you sleep with, you don't necessarily want to be pregnant by them either, but shit happens... And not everyone believes in abortion...
In my opinion and from experience, its much better to raise children in two happy homes than one miserable one...
Also, I've been a wife, a girlfriend & a baby mama... Being a wife isnt all its cracked up to be... I am treated more like a wife now that when I actually was one...

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