How Do You Deal with People Trying to Make You Think YOU'RE the Crazy One?

So I have a few different situations in my life, involved parties all think I'm the crazy one.

  1. So my first love....a bum by your standards, a bum with potential by mine. But the thing is, he does not see any need for correction. He's a good guy, just no motivation, no job, no real income, no nothing....IMO he looks for women that "will be down for him" and I'm not down enough. He says that he doesn't trust that I will stick with him through the thick and thin. I won't...especially if sticking means letting him drive my car, live wit me rent free, give him a few when he aint got money, don't expect no money on bills, and expect him to get and keep a job, OH AND BE COOL WITH HIM MESSING WITH OTHER CHICKS< NOT COMING HOME AT NIGHT AND DRIVING THEIR CAR IF I DONT LET HIM DRIVE MINE. He says his BM is a better woman than me, because "she has done things for him that no one else did -"to her credit" .....for real......like wtf.....what is wrong with me expecting him to be good with what he can provide from himself, and not having to chip in to help him out? What's so bad about wanting to trust that I can depend on him, instead of me having to always be stable enough to take care of two of us, plus any kids we may have?
  2. I told yall about a personal situation that I thought was happening back in like January. So it's true, it's happening. A minor confirmed it. A sister saw it. It's real. Why am I crazy for wanting the adult party to MOVE AND STAY away for ever? Why am I crazy for believing a minor? Why am I crazy to rather be alone than to go through this real BS just to say I got a man? Why folk mad at me for bringing it to the open? Why am I crazy to be planning a way to make sure the minor is safe?
  3. Lastly, if you flip and cuss me out, talk ish to me and then throw in my face, embarrassing situations, why am I crazy if I choose to pass up on you as my man? Why do I "need help" if I say, "naw, I'm good, I don't want to be with you?"

I get so pissed at folk tryna make me seem like I am crazy just cuz I aint with the BS. I know I aint the only one...what about yall.....are folk tryna make u think u are crazy when you know your logic is sane as plain day?

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Love thank you for being a real woman and posting this thread.

Girl please, you know damn well that n***a dont have potential  Dont tell anybody else that; that's probably why they're acting like you're crazy

LMFAO...tell the truth and shame the devil Smitty!!

"Love..." this is your auntie, don't make me get my switch after you. lmfao that is NOT what we call potential. That is called wishful thinking.

You know life is urs, so i hope that you never give a damn about the next person's opinion or disposition in your personal affairs. Let them think you are crazy.

University of Smitty said:

Girl please, you know damn well that n***a dont have potential  Dont tell anybody else that; that's probably why they're acting like you're crazy

Most women invest more in men that don't have any potential

University of Smitty said:

Girl please, you know damn well that n***a dont have potential  Dont tell anybody else that; that's probably why they're acting like you're crazy

Lol Aunties yall crazy. But I thank yall! So it's this...he is good with kids. He likes them. He is cool and not all demanding and controlling. The thing is I don't want to be with him today, but for real if he had a job with a lil history, I'd consider it. Yall know the last was good onpaper but when it came down to the things that mattered he had a F. This dude is a F on paper, but thethings like family and integrity I think he is good. I just wish he'd work. And Tone what u mean by ur comment?
@Tone - I don't consider myself investing into him. I think that is why he can't paint a fairytale picture of a happyily ever after with me cuz he knows that it aint going down like that over here. I will concede, it is wishful thinking. But whycant hejust get his ish right so we can get it poppin? when ifirst met him, hehad everything together. He took care of everybody. But now its like he is cool going without. I think he has potential cuz once upon a time I could depend on him to not let me fall. Now I can't depend onhim for twenty dollars. And he feels that I expect too much or I should giving to him instead of being able to depend on him. We broke up when I was 21 and ever since then, I've been hoping that the person I met would come back so I could be with him again. But that person is like gone. And I'm like wtf. Why???? Get it together!

I wrote somewhere on here that we cannot want something more for someone than someone wants for themselves. You have to own that. He is not who is was. He has lost his motivation or either it was never really there and it appeared to be so in your 21 year old eyes. He sounds like a taker and has found a niche' in being the reciever and not the giver. When someone tells you that you expect too much you do. You have to expect that they will never deliver those things you wish for. He is not the one. You know that, your rational mind knows that, but that little voice that wants that family stability and love wants the reality to be something different.

Love is a Losing Game said:

@Tone - I don't consider myself investing into him. I think that is why he can't paint a fairytale picture of a happyily ever after with me cuz he knows that it aint going down like that over here. I will concede, it is wishful thinking. But whycant hejust get his ish right so we can get it poppin? when ifirst met him, hehad everything together. He took care of everybody. But now its like he is cool going without. I think he has potential cuz once upon a time I could depend on him to not let me fall. Now I can't depend onhim for twenty dollars. And he feels that I expect too much or I should giving to him instead of being able to depend on him. We broke up when I was 21 and ever since then, I've been hoping that the person I met would come back so I could be with him again. But that person is like gone. And I'm like wtf. Why???? Get it together!

He was always a bum but at 21 what he gave you was enough. You're investing time& hope that he will be something that he does not want to be.
Love is a Losing Game said:

@Tone - I don't consider myself investing into him. I think that is why he can't paint a fairytale picture of a happyily ever after with me cuz he knows that it aint going down like that over here. I will concede, it is wishful thinking. But whycant hejust get his ish right so we can get it poppin? when ifirst met him, hehad everything together. He took care of everybody. But now its like he is cool going without. I think he has potential cuz once upon a time I could depend on him to not let me fall. Now I can't depend onhim for twenty dollars. And he feels that I expect too much or I should giving to him instead of being able to depend on him. We broke up when I was 21 and ever since then, I've been hoping that the person I met would come back so I could be with him again. But that person is like gone. And I'm like wtf. Why???? Get it together!
@luv yea I think I read that in the 2012 reflections post. And Tone I hate to say it but I agree with you too. I don't know how this happens. It's like every day I'm trying to do better and its hard to understand how folk just be like, I'm good....I'm bout to coast for the next few years. Lol that small voice don't want that mentality to be a reality. And Tone I think the only thing I may be investing is thought because I haven't told him that I wish it could be like it was. I just listen and then ask questions toanswer the questions I have in mind. Me and my ma have a love/hate relationship....I love her like two seconds each day and hate her for the rest and she likes him. That shoulda been my hint. Hell maybe I am crazy!

$20???   He sounds like an addict to me.  What does he need to use your car for if he doesnt have $20??  It's not like he has to go to work.  His azz should be at home CLEANING!!!!!

 

As for Tone, you made his day with this 'pookie' confession.


Love is a Losing Game said:

@Tone - I don't consider myself investing into him. I think that is why he can't paint a fairytale picture of a happyily ever after with me cuz he knows that it aint going down like that over here. I will concede, it is wishful thinking. But whycant hejust get his ish right so we can get it poppin? when ifirst met him, hehad everything together. He took care of everybody. But now its like he is cool going without. I think he has potential cuz once upon a time I could depend on him to not let me fall. Now I can't depend onhim for twenty dollars. And he feels that I expect too much or I should giving to him instead of being able to depend on him. We broke up when I was 21 and ever since then, I've been hoping that the person I met would come back so I could be with him again. But that person is like gone. And I'm like wtf. Why???? Get it together!

How old is this guy?

Love is a Losing Game said:

@luv yea I think I read that in the 2012 reflections post. And Tone I hate to say it but I agree with you too. I don't know how this happens. It's like every day I'm trying to do better and its hard to understand how folk just be like, I'm good....I'm bout to coast for the next few years. Lol that small voice don't want that mentality to be a reality. And Tone I think the only thing I may be investing is thought because I haven't told him that I wish it could be like it was. I just listen and then ask questions toanswer the questions I have in mind. Me and my ma have a love/hate relationship....I love her like two seconds each day and hate her for the rest and she likes him. That shoulda been my hint. Hell maybe I am crazy!
@luv yea I think I read that in the 2012 reflections post. And Tone I hate to say it but I agree with you too. I don't know how this happens. It's like every day I'm trying to do better and its hard to understand how folk just be like, I'm good....I'm bout to coast for the next few years. Lol that small voice don't want that mentality to be a reality. And Tone I think the only thing I may be investing is thought because I haven't told him that I wish it could be like it was. I just listen and then ask questions toanswer the questions I have in mind. Me and my ma have a love/hate relationship....I love her like two seconds each day and hate her for the rest and she likes him. That shoulda been my hint. Hell maybe I am crazy!

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