A friend and I were having a discussion when she said this "have you noticed how many fine men have ugly wives and girlfriends?? Why is a woman like me single?" so it made me wonder, do you think it's harder for an attractive woman with all her stuff together to get and keep a man? Do looks play any part at all in why a pretty woman might have a hard time in a relationship with an insecure man? Personally I've been in a relationship with an insecure man that cheated on me with some strange creatures and after we ended it, years later, he told me its because he never felt like he was good enough for me and the reason he went for women like the one he cheated with was because she worshipped him and made him feel like he was the best looking man she'd ever had (I never made him feel like that but his insecurities messed with his perception I guess) so what do you all think? Been in a similar situation?

Tags: Insecure, boogawoof, pretty, wtfiswrongwithsomemen

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Those guys you are dealing with are gay. 


Jewels said:

I just want to comment on straight men wanting or having one time relations with gay men. I'm a dominatrix and my customers are all straight men who request that I tell stories of them sleeping with other men. Then...they go back to their normal lives with their wives and kids without ever having sex with an actual man. I guess every man is different and you will never know whats truly going on in his head. So to assume that straight men don't think about other men is asinine. You just never know. A man can be straight in the sense that he has never slept with another man all while fantasizing about sleeping with other men.

- Is it hard being attractive?

I think so, I agree that people don't take pretty women serious. We kind of have to prove our intelligence and strength in the business world more than less attractive women. As for dating, men are also afraid of rejection and they go for the less attractive woman because she is not only a bit easier...but she is probably going to start a convo with a guy she wants while the pretty woman is still sitting on her butt waiting for HIM to come speak to her.

I have dated men that always accused me of cheating and they always say I look like that type chick to cheat cause they no I get offers an in the long run they end up cheating or leavin me cause they think sooner or later I'll do it to them I'm not saying I'm all that but I can and have turned a head or two I just find it hard to believe u would think I will cheat cause of how I looked and further more why pursue me in the first place if u think this??????

I'm going out on a limb and assume ALL straight men don't think about having sex with other men.  Being a straight/heterosexual man is mutually exclusive to any other sexual orientation.  I can't be straight and be attracted to another man....that would make me bisexual.  It's the sexual attraction not the act of sex that denotes the orientation: hetero, bi, or h***.  I'll assume you knew all that....so why bring up your role as a dominatrix?  Men who use your services are being submissive to you.  Telling stories about them being with other men is just humiliating.  Do they get aroused?  Is the arousal caused by being submissive or fantasizing about being with the men in your stories?  If it's the later, they are bi.

Jewels said:

I just want to comment on straight men wanting or having one time relations with gay men. I'm a dominatrix and my customers are all straight men who request that I tell stories of them sleeping with other men. Then...they go back to their normal lives with their wives and kids without ever having sex with an actual man. I guess every man is different and you will never know whats truly going on in his head. So to assume that straight men don't think about other men is asinine. You just never know. A man can be straight in the sense that he has never slept with another man all while fantasizing about sleeping with other men.

- Is it hard being attractive?

I think so, I agree that people don't take pretty women serious. We kind of have to prove our intelligence and strength in the business world more than less attractive women. As for dating, men are also afraid of rejection and they go for the less attractive woman because she is not only a bit easier...but she is probably going to start a convo with a guy she wants while the pretty woman is still sitting on her butt waiting for HIM to come speak to her.

I guess every man is different and you will never know whats truly going on in his head. So to assume that straight men don't think about other men is asinine.You just never know.

Despite what I think, you or anyone else, if a man has sexual desires towards other men but decides to claim "straight" then that's what the people in his everyday life will see him as. Life is not black and white, people do keep secrets you know. I made the statement because I agree with Darnell. There were comments made similar to the one you just posted and I have actually seen what he mentioned first hand. Therefore, I am one to say Yes it is true for some men. Maybe not you, but you never know whose truth it may be around you.

I won't carry this portion of the convo on any longer. 


goldfinger said:

I'm going out on a limb and assume ALL straight men don't think about having sex with other men.  Being a straight/heterosexual man is mutually exclusive to any other sexual orientation.  I can't be straight and be attracted to another man....that would make me bisexual.  It's the sexual attraction not the act of sex that denotes the orientation: hetero, bi, or h***.  I'll assume you knew all that....so why bring up your role as a dominatrix?  Men who use your services are being submissive to you.  Telling stories about them being with other men is just humiliating.  Do they get aroused?  Is the arousal caused by being submissive or fantasizing about being with the men in your stories?  If it's the later, they are bi.

Jewels said:

I just want to comment on straight men wanting or having one time relations with gay men. I'm a dominatrix and my customers are all straight men who request that I tell stories of them sleeping with other men. Then...they go back to their normal lives with their wives and kids without ever having sex with an actual man. I guess every man is different and you will never know whats truly going on in his head. So to assume that straight men don't think about other men is asinine. You just never know. A man can be straight in the sense that he has never slept with another man all while fantasizing about sleeping with other men.

- Is it hard being attractive?

I think so, I agree that people don't take pretty women serious. We kind of have to prove our intelligence and strength in the business world more than less attractive women. As for dating, men are also afraid of rejection and they go for the less attractive woman because she is not only a bit easier...but she is probably going to start a convo with a guy she wants while the pretty woman is still sitting on her butt waiting for HIM to come speak to her.

These young girls dont know how to dress for church either. I saw this one chick with 6 inch stileto's and some black and white striped dress or skirt walking down the street to get into her car after church. No stockings or anything. Just bare-legged, 6 inch stilleto's, in church. These chicks need to know the difference. They dress like they're going to the club, in church!
 
LuckyStrike351 said:

The part about men looking at women as just sex objects, I mean, how is that such a problem so as long as you're not being hurt, or violated?  

It's a fundamental part of life woman! Men HUNT down women for SEX despite all this modern cultural BS. Get use to it because NOTHING is changing.

Also, part of the problem if you're attracting way too much male attention is your own fault for walking out in the public with sexy clothes/shoes on.

Dam, the S** I see on the street, do any of you girls THINK before you step outside the house?

THINK such as, "Hmmm, how will men view me with this on?" 

For real, the way you girls are dressing today to go to the office, or whatever, is what girls back in the 80's use to wear when they would walk the streets looking to turn a trick. Women today lost all ability to behave and dress like a LADY.



Love is a Losing Game said:

Having been considered an ugly girl for a loooooonnnnggg time, I can talk about a bit of both sides. First, let me say, I miss being ugly. I think life was so much easier then. I mean "I wasn't gettin niggas doe" in my philly girl voice, lol, but there was no pressure either. I could just live my life and be happy about it. Being considered pretty has three major drawbacks to me:

  1. Ladies hate you. period.
  2. Men only see the physical and most just wanna f*ck one time, then try to get to know u.
  3. Everybody thinks you are dumb and shallow.

In my pretty girl life, I have found that I have to tread lightly when I working with other women. Even having women as friends. At work, I try to downplay my looks by not wearing makeup, super stylish clothes or even heels. I try to just "look regular" and not put a bunch of fuss into my outer appearance. Women, especially women in power DO NOT like pretty bishes around them! If you are a pretty bish u better watch out, cuz they and the rest of the average hoes will hate you!

Men only see the sexy part. I mean they try to pretend that they want to know enough about you to make u think they care and ish, but they be interested in hittin that OFF BAT! Then, I think they may consider getting to know you. Also, some men are intimidated like yall stated. They try to "lower" you by talking ish and slick tryna put u down. Some try to hurt you emotionally or even physically. 

Lastly, folk think a pretty bish is as dumb as a bag of rocks. I get soooo tired of folk trying me. I mean seriously. They think cuz I smile and am cool about a lot of stuff that I am just dumb and don't know ish. This is another reason why I miss my ugly days. People listened to me and I feel like they weighed my words. Now, I think when folk hear me talking they be thinking "aw this bish got it made, she don't know s*** about what I'm talking about.

 

The reality is that I still feel like the same person I was before people started tellin me I was cute. I still think the same and treat folk the same. I still want to treat folk good, and I want to be treated good. It's not all about me, I focus my efforts on others, but I guess my outer makes it hard for people to see what I need and want in my inner. I will admit tho, as a pretty girl, I don't have to get a man through my personality. I miss that too from my ugly days. I used to be able to get to know guys and learn alot from them. but now, I think the convo is way different than it was.

*hangs head in shame* If she was getting into a black mustang then it was me lol. But seriously I do that all the time. I can't stand stockings and I swore as a child that the second I got old enough, I would never wear them again. (With the exception of funerals). But in my defense I do wear below the knee dresses/skirts or dress pants when I go bare. But I do agree that the standard of dressing up for church has changed. With the exception of blazers and accessories church attire should have nothing in common with club attire.

Honeycoated said:

These young girls dont know how to dress for church either. I saw this one chick with 6 inch stileto's and some black and white striped dress or skirt walking down the street to get into her car after church. No stockings or anything. Just bare-legged, 6 inch stilleto's, in church. These chicks need to know the difference. They dress like they're going to the club, in church!
 
LuckyStrike351 said:

The part about men looking at women as just sex objects, I mean, how is that such a problem so as long as you're not being hurt, or violated?  

It's a fundamental part of life woman! Men HUNT down women for SEX despite all this modern cultural BS. Get use to it because NOTHING is changing.

Also, part of the problem if you're attracting way too much male attention is your own fault for walking out in the public with sexy clothes/shoes on.

Dam, the S** I see on the street, do any of you girls THINK before you step outside the house?

THINK such as, "Hmmm, how will men view me with this on?" 

For real, the way you girls are dressing today to go to the office, or whatever, is what girls back in the 80's use to wear when they would walk the streets looking to turn a trick. Women today lost all ability to behave and dress like a LADY.



Love is a Losing Game said:

Having been considered an ugly girl for a loooooonnnnggg time, I can talk about a bit of both sides. First, let me say, I miss being ugly. I think life was so much easier then. I mean "I wasn't gettin niggas doe" in my philly girl voice, lol, but there was no pressure either. I could just live my life and be happy about it. Being considered pretty has three major drawbacks to me:

  1. Ladies hate you. period.
  2. Men only see the physical and most just wanna f*ck one time, then try to get to know u.
  3. Everybody thinks you are dumb and shallow.

In my pretty girl life, I have found that I have to tread lightly when I working with other women. Even having women as friends. At work, I try to downplay my looks by not wearing makeup, super stylish clothes or even heels. I try to just "look regular" and not put a bunch of fuss into my outer appearance. Women, especially women in power DO NOT like pretty bishes around them! If you are a pretty bish u better watch out, cuz they and the rest of the average hoes will hate you!

Men only see the sexy part. I mean they try to pretend that they want to know enough about you to make u think they care and ish, but they be interested in hittin that OFF BAT! Then, I think they may consider getting to know you. Also, some men are intimidated like yall stated. They try to "lower" you by talking ish and slick tryna put u down. Some try to hurt you emotionally or even physically. 

Lastly, folk think a pretty bish is as dumb as a bag of rocks. I get soooo tired of folk trying me. I mean seriously. They think cuz I smile and am cool about a lot of stuff that I am just dumb and don't know ish. This is another reason why I miss my ugly days. People listened to me and I feel like they weighed my words. Now, I think when folk hear me talking they be thinking "aw this bish got it made, she don't know s*** about what I'm talking about.

 

The reality is that I still feel like the same person I was before people started tellin me I was cute. I still think the same and treat folk the same. I still want to treat folk good, and I want to be treated good. It's not all about me, I focus my efforts on others, but I guess my outer makes it hard for people to see what I need and want in my inner. I will admit tho, as a pretty girl, I don't have to get a man through my personality. I miss that too from my ugly days. I used to be able to get to know guys and learn alot from them. but now, I think the convo is way different than it was.

or me...but does anyone still wear stockings??
 
McKenna Hylton said:

*hangs head in shame* If she was getting into a black mustang then it was me lol. But seriously I do that all the time. I can't stand stockings and I swore as a child that the second I got old enough, I would never wear them again. (With the exception of funerals). But in my defense I do wear below the knee dresses/skirts or dress pants when I go bare. But I do agree that the standard of dressing up for church has changed. With the exception of blazers and accessories church attire should have nothing in common with club attire.

Honeycoated said:

These young girls dont know how to dress for church either. I saw this one chick with 6 inch stileto's and some black and white striped dress or skirt walking down the street to get into her car after church. No stockings or anything. Just bare-legged, 6 inch stilleto's, in church. These chicks need to know the difference. They dress like they're going to the club, in church!
 

Girl I woulda got KILT if my mother saw me out without stockings on. I carried that ALL THE WAY until I was like 26 or 27. I mean, I was in southern heat in the summer at work with STOCKINGS on! People made fun of me lol. I ALWAYS wear stockings to church tho.

MS. UCAN NEVA GET ENUFF!! said:

or me...but does anyone still wear stockings??
 
McKenna Hylton said:

*hangs head in shame* If she was getting into a black mustang then it was me lol. But seriously I do that all the time. I can't stand stockings and I swore as a child that the second I got old enough, I would never wear them again. (With the exception of funerals). But in my defense I do wear below the knee dresses/skirts or dress pants when I go bare. But I do agree that the standard of dressing up for church has changed. With the exception of blazers and accessories church attire should have nothing in common with club attire.

Honeycoated said:

These young girls dont know how to dress for church either. I saw this one chick with 6 inch stileto's and some black and white striped dress or skirt walking down the street to get into her car after church. No stockings or anything. Just bare-legged, 6 inch stilleto's, in church. These chicks need to know the difference. They dress like they're going to the club, in church!
 

if you not gonna wear stockings, at least dont have on an above the knee skirt, no stockings AND stilleto's that are for clubbing
 
MS. UCAN NEVA GET ENUFF!! said:

or me...but does anyone still wear stockings??
 
McKenna Hylton said:

*hangs head in shame* If she was getting into a black mustang then it was me lol. But seriously I do that all the time. I can't stand stockings and I swore as a child that the second I got old enough, I would never wear them again. (With the exception of funerals). But in my defense I do wear below the knee dresses/skirts or dress pants when I go bare. But I do agree that the standard of dressing up for church has changed. With the exception of blazers and accessories church attire should have nothing in common with club attire.

Honeycoated said:

These young girls dont know how to dress for church either. I saw this one chick with 6 inch stileto's and some black and white striped dress or skirt walking down the street to get into her car after church. No stockings or anything. Just bare-legged, 6 inch stilleto's, in church. These chicks need to know the difference. They dress like they're going to the club, in church!
 

Beauty is more than skin deep...having a pretty face doesn't make up for being dumb as a box of rocks, or fugly on the inside.  Pretty don't keep you warm at night, either.  If a woman is single, she needs to examine herself--not the next chick that ALREADY has her man.

I had trouble being attractive in my teenage and 20's years, in late 20's I learned how to control and use it to my advantage. When I was 16 boys were trying to get my attention, stalking me and doing crazy ish, i was scared and annoyed because I was just a child who wanted to read books and basically a total nerd who just happened to be a pretty girl. Later in college older men were preying on my youth and tried to buy me and sometimes it worked because at that time I was easy to impress with money, cars, lifestyle. The men I actually liked would never approach me, I like guys who are smart, into science, cool stuff, who are funny and like to explore world just like I do. Men who approached me usually were obnoxious self centered jerks, full of themselves, or players who would just try to hit on anything. I used to go on first dates in overalls, no makeup and ate garlic lol but they wouldn't care. Then I learned that it depends on me only how people are going to perceive me and what I allow them. I changed my game entirely, I dress classy, wear natural make up, I don't allow foolishness and negativity to affect me and I took control of who I choose to be with and I never made a big deal of my appearance because I'm still a nerd who is happened to be a pretty girl lol.

And you will be a lonely old women

Brii said:

I am not shallow.. I'm very picky and I wouldn't settle for anyone just to say I have a man... I have learned that I'm not easy to deal with lol I'm SPOILED ROTTEN 

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