A friend and I were having a discussion when she said this "have you noticed how many fine men have ugly wives and girlfriends?? Why is a woman like me single?" so it made me wonder, do you think it's harder for an attractive woman with all her stuff together to get and keep a man? Do looks play any part at all in why a pretty woman might have a hard time in a relationship with an insecure man? Personally I've been in a relationship with an insecure man that cheated on me with some strange creatures and after we ended it, years later, he told me its because he never felt like he was good enough for me and the reason he went for women like the one he cheated with was because she worshipped him and made him feel like he was the best looking man she'd ever had (I never made him feel like that but his insecurities messed with his perception I guess) so what do you all think? Been in a similar situation?

Tags: Insecure, boogawoof, pretty, wtfiswrongwithsomemen

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Girl I woulda got KILT if my mother saw me out without stockings on. I carried that ALL THE WAY until I was like 26 or 27. I mean, I was in southern heat in the summer at work with STOCKINGS on! People made fun of me lol. I ALWAYS wear stockings to church tho.

MS. UCAN NEVA GET ENUFF!! said:

or me...but does anyone still wear stockings??
 
McKenna Hylton said:

*hangs head in shame* If she was getting into a black mustang then it was me lol. But seriously I do that all the time. I can't stand stockings and I swore as a child that the second I got old enough, I would never wear them again. (With the exception of funerals). But in my defense I do wear below the knee dresses/skirts or dress pants when I go bare. But I do agree that the standard of dressing up for church has changed. With the exception of blazers and accessories church attire should have nothing in common with club attire.

Honeycoated said:

These young girls dont know how to dress for church either. I saw this one chick with 6 inch stileto's and some black and white striped dress or skirt walking down the street to get into her car after church. No stockings or anything. Just bare-legged, 6 inch stilleto's, in church. These chicks need to know the difference. They dress like they're going to the club, in church!
 

if you not gonna wear stockings, at least dont have on an above the knee skirt, no stockings AND stilleto's that are for clubbing
 
MS. UCAN NEVA GET ENUFF!! said:

or me...but does anyone still wear stockings??
 
McKenna Hylton said:

*hangs head in shame* If she was getting into a black mustang then it was me lol. But seriously I do that all the time. I can't stand stockings and I swore as a child that the second I got old enough, I would never wear them again. (With the exception of funerals). But in my defense I do wear below the knee dresses/skirts or dress pants when I go bare. But I do agree that the standard of dressing up for church has changed. With the exception of blazers and accessories church attire should have nothing in common with club attire.

Honeycoated said:

These young girls dont know how to dress for church either. I saw this one chick with 6 inch stileto's and some black and white striped dress or skirt walking down the street to get into her car after church. No stockings or anything. Just bare-legged, 6 inch stilleto's, in church. These chicks need to know the difference. They dress like they're going to the club, in church!
 

Beauty is more than skin deep...having a pretty face doesn't make up for being dumb as a box of rocks, or fugly on the inside.  Pretty don't keep you warm at night, either.  If a woman is single, she needs to examine herself--not the next chick that ALREADY has her man.

I had trouble being attractive in my teenage and 20's years, in late 20's I learned how to control and use it to my advantage. When I was 16 boys were trying to get my attention, stalking me and doing crazy ish, i was scared and annoyed because I was just a child who wanted to read books and basically a total nerd who just happened to be a pretty girl. Later in college older men were preying on my youth and tried to buy me and sometimes it worked because at that time I was easy to impress with money, cars, lifestyle. The men I actually liked would never approach me, I like guys who are smart, into science, cool stuff, who are funny and like to explore world just like I do. Men who approached me usually were obnoxious self centered jerks, full of themselves, or players who would just try to hit on anything. I used to go on first dates in overalls, no makeup and ate garlic lol but they wouldn't care. Then I learned that it depends on me only how people are going to perceive me and what I allow them. I changed my game entirely, I dress classy, wear natural make up, I don't allow foolishness and negativity to affect me and I took control of who I choose to be with and I never made a big deal of my appearance because I'm still a nerd who is happened to be a pretty girl lol.

And you will be a lonely old women

Brii said:

I am not shallow.. I'm very picky and I wouldn't settle for anyone just to say I have a man... I have learned that I'm not easy to deal with lol I'm SPOILED ROTTEN 

My grandmother has a mini heart attack every time I come down the stairs "dressed" for church w/o stockings but even as much as I love her I refuse to deal with stockings. 

Love is a Losing Game said:

Girl I woulda got KILT if my mother saw me out without stockings on. I carried that ALL THE WAY until I was like 26 or 27. I mean, I was in southern heat in the summer at work with STOCKINGS on! People made fun of me lol. I ALWAYS wear stockings to church tho.

MS. UCAN NEVA GET ENUFF!! said:

or me...but does anyone still wear stockings??
 
McKenna Hylton said:

*hangs head in shame* If she was getting into a black mustang then it was me lol. But seriously I do that all the time. I can't stand stockings and I swore as a child that the second I got old enough, I would never wear them again. (With the exception of funerals). But in my defense I do wear below the knee dresses/skirts or dress pants when I go bare. But I do agree that the standard of dressing up for church has changed. With the exception of blazers and accessories church attire should have nothing in common with club attire.

Honeycoated said:

These young girls dont know how to dress for church either. I saw this one chick with 6 inch stileto's and some black and white striped dress or skirt walking down the street to get into her car after church. No stockings or anything. Just bare-legged, 6 inch stilleto's, in church. These chicks need to know the difference. They dress like they're going to the club, in church!
 

I agree..."Ladies hate you. period."



Love is a Losing Game said:

Having been considered an ugly girl for a loooooonnnnggg time, I can talk about a bit of both sides. First, let me say, I miss being ugly. I think life was so much easier then. I mean "I wasn't gettin niggas doe" in my philly girl voice, lol, but there was no pressure either. I could just live my life and be happy about it. Being considered pretty has three major drawbacks to me:

  1. Ladies hate you. period.
  2. Men only see the physical and most just wanna f*ck one time, then try to get to know u.
  3. Everybody thinks you are dumb and shallow.

In my pretty girl life, I have found that I have to tread lightly when I working with other women. Even having women as friends. At work, I try to downplay my looks by not wearing makeup, super stylish clothes or even heels. I try to just "look regular" and not put a bunch of fuss into my outer appearance. Women, especially women in power DO NOT like pretty bishes around them! If you are a pretty bish u better watch out, cuz they and the rest of the average hoes will hate you!

Men only see the sexy part. I mean they try to pretend that they want to know enough about you to make u think they care and ish, but they be interested in hittin that OFF BAT! Then, I think they may consider getting to know you. Also, some men are intimidated like yall stated. They try to "lower" you by talking ish and slick tryna put u down. Some try to hurt you emotionally or even physically. 

Lastly, folk think a pretty bish is as dumb as a bag of rocks. I get soooo tired of folk trying me. I mean seriously. They think cuz I smile and am cool about a lot of stuff that I am just dumb and don't know ish. This is another reason why I miss my ugly days. People listened to me and I feel like they weighed my words. Now, I think when folk hear me talking they be thinking "aw this bish got it made, she don't know s*** about what I'm talking about.

 

The reality is that I still feel like the same person I was before people started tellin me I was cute. I still think the same and treat folk the same. I still want to treat folk good, and I want to be treated good. It's not all about me, I focus my efforts on others, but I guess my outer makes it hard for people to see what I need and want in my inner. I will admit tho, as a pretty girl, I don't have to get a man through my personality. I miss that too from my ugly days. I used to be able to get to know guys and learn alot from them. but now, I think the convo is way different than it was.

I don't consider myself to be pretty enough to where it affects my life. I would say I'm a 7...maybe a 9 on a good day. With everyones logic (pretty people are hard to approach) that is probably the reason I get hit on all the freakin time (me being a 7). I would say its still hard for me because I am usually always with a friend and guys will try to only hit on me and not my friend (my friends are pretty too). If there are several guys in the pack, usually the guy who gets my friends number might ask them for mine later on. A lot of females I don't know are distrustful of me when they first meet me. I don't like to be in the same room alone with a guy and I don't try to make friends with ANY person my friends are dating. They look at me funny, an extra wink here, a smile there, a touch there. I am constantly on my guard with men, they never want to be my "friend". They always trying to hit or flirt. Oh and females assume I am a b****.

+1
its a shame that i can't just let go and be me and try to trust men. they end up being up to no good. -___-


Breyella said:

I don't consider myself to be pretty enough to where it affects my life. I would say I'm a 7...maybe a 9 on a good day. With everyones logic (pretty people are hard to approach) that is probably the reason I get hit on all the freakin time (me being a 7). I would say its still hard for me because I am usually always with a friend and guys will try to only hit on me and not my friend (my friends are pretty too). If there are several guys in the pack, usually the guy who gets my friends number might ask them for mine later on. A lot of females I don't know are distrustful of me when they first meet me. I don't like to be in the same room alone with a guy and I don't try to make friends with ANY person my friends are dating. They look at me funny, an extra wink here, a smile there, a touch there. I am constantly on my guard with men, they never want to be my "friend". They always trying to hit or flirt. Oh and females assume I am a b****.

I have changed my style since this post; I'm natural now, and I just knew that it would make me ugly...you know going through the shorter stages and all. But what I am finding is men STILL see the pretty in me or the sexy in me if I dress up, well even if I'm not dressed up. Last year I used to wear flats and an afro puff on dates and still guys acted the same as if I were in my pencil skirts and pumps. Men can see beauty no matter how you try to hide it. Still being hit on and flirted with in my natural state, no make up, dressed down made me understand that it is nothing wrong with playing up your features and looking cute, putting effort into your look. Men behave the same either way. One thing I know for sure tho is that my personality is what attracts people to me and my outer appearance added to that makes me unstoppable in ANY situation.  

I'm not conceited in the least bit, but I do find this to ring true for me. Whenever I'm out the only men who hit on me are the men whom I would not take any interest in. It's not all about looks for me, but I do like my men to have a certain appeal to them. When I do come across an attractive man, he normally just looks( or gazes) and  moves right along. Men have no problem telling me that I am attractive, but it normally stops there because he is either not my type or he just moves along. I think I need to implant myself in a better environment and it will get better. hopefully.

Pure truth.   

Love is a Losing Game DSP Fame said:

I have changed my style since this post; I'm natural now, and I just knew that it would make me ugly...you know going through the shorter stages and all. But what I am finding is men STILL see the pretty in me or the sexy in me if I dress up, well even if I'm not dressed up. Last year I used to wear flats and an afro puff on dates and still guys acted the same as if I were in my pencil skirts and pumps. Men can see beauty no matter how you try to hide it. Still being hit on and flirted with in my natural state, no make up, dressed down made me understand that it is nothing wrong with playing up your features and looking cute, putting effort into your look. Men behave the same either way. One thing I know for sure tho is that my personality is what attracts people to me and my outer appearance added to that makes me unstoppable in ANY situation.  

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