Jill Scott: My soul burns when I see a Black Man with a White Woman

 

 

 

actress, philanthropist, mother and all-around Renaissance woman, Jill Scott gets to the root of our feelings on the matter.

My new friend is handsome, African-American, intelligent and seemingly wealthy. He is an athlete, loves his momma, and is happily married to a White woman. I admit when I saw his wedding ring, I privately hoped. But something in me just knew he didn't marry a sister. Although my guess hit the mark, when my friend told me his wife was indeed Caucasian, I felt my spirit...wince. I didn't immediately understand it. My face read happy for you. My body showed no reaction to my inner pinch, but the sting was there, quiet like a mosquito under a summer dress.



Was I jealous? Did the reality of his relationship somehow diminish his soul's credibility? The answer is not simple. One could easily dispel the wince as racist or separatist, but that's not how I was brought up. I was reared in a Jehovah's Witness household. I was taught that every man should be judged by his deeds and not his color, and I firmly stand where my grandmother left me. African people worldwide are known to be welcoming and open-minded. We share our culture sometimes to our own peril and most of us love the very notion of love. My position is that for women of color, this very common "wince" has solely to do with the African story in America.

When our people were enslaved, "Massa" placed his Caucasian woman on a pedestal. She was spoiled, revered and angelic, while the Black slave woman was overworked, beaten, raped and farmed out like cattle to be mated. She was nothing and neither was our Black man. As slavery died for the greater good of America, and the movement for equality sputtered to life, the White woman was on the cover of every American magazine. She was the dazzling jewel on every movie screen, the glory of every commercial and television show. She was unequivocally the standard of beauty for this country, firmly unattainable to anyone not of her race. We daughters of the dust were seen as ugly, nappy mammies, good for day work and unwanted children, while our men were thought to be thieving, sex-hungry animals with limited brain capacity.

We reflect on this awful past and recall that if a Black man even looked at a White woman, he would have been lynched, beaten, jailed or shot to death. In the midst of this, Black women and Black men struggled together, mourned together, starved together, braved the hoses and vicious police dogs and died untimely on southern back roads together. These harsh truths lead to what we really feel when we see a seemingly together brother with a Caucasian woman and their children. That feeling is betrayed. While we exert efforts to raise our sons and daughters to appreciate themselves and respect others, most of us end up doing this important work alone, with no fathers or like representatives, limited financial support (often court-enforced) and, on top of everything else, an empty bed. It's frustrating and it hurts!

Our minds do understand that people of all races find genuine love in many places. We dig that the world is full of amazing options. But underneath, there is a bite, no matter the ointment, that has yet to stop burning. Some may find these thoughts to be hurtful. That is not my intent. I'm just sayin'.

 

 

OMG I CAN'T SLEEP SO POSTING RANDOM ISSUES.. SAW THIS ON A GOSSIP BOARD IT'S FROM ESSENCE

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I totally understand where she is coming from... we constantly talk about the breakdown of the american family and this is a part of it... now my soul doesn't burn, but I can feel her... If its a trifling brother" I honestly do not care, but if he is a seemingly good dude (rich or poor) I get a lil aggrivated... which is rough for me since I have a mixed niece and nephew... and then all ther other "nieces and nephews"

I think the issue is, that they really can not understand our struggle. They can be sympathetic, but they have no real clue... I have seen first hand a cool a$$ white chick get mad at her husband and call him nigger... I've seen them get upset when someone refers to their children as black. On the other hand, I have seen chicks who know they are white, but understand that their children husband are black americans... they want to know learn so they can be educated...

I truly believe that love knows no color, but it doesn't mean people won't question the real motives...

I could go on and on...
I understand where she is coming from...
I agree 100%.

Who cares! I don't wince or feel it deep down in my soul, lol.

Tab said:
I am not trying to disregard her feelings but;when I see a black man with a white women, I DON'T CARE! I can no longer make this an issue for me. I have enough baggage. Ppl act like black men dating white women created the h*** in the ozone layer.

Tell me, why does it hurts when the black man is wealthy?
neither do I, but just cause you doesn't mean its okay to discount her feelings...

Fantasia'sGEDTutor said:
I agree 100%.

Who cares! I don't wince or feel it deep down in my soul, lol.

Tab said:
I am not trying to disregard her feelings but;when I see a black man with a white women, I DON'T CARE! I can no longer make this an issue for me. I have enough baggage. Ppl act like black men dating white women created the h*** in the ozone layer.

Tell me, why does it hurts when the black man is wealthy?
i've said this before, and i'll say it again: public figures don't need to be making these kinds of statments publicly. it's not as if she's standing up for some major cause, this is simply an opinion. jill is an actress and musician who relies on people OF ALL COLORS to support her endeavors...you don't need to be alienating potential money in your pocket/opportunities with statements like this. i'm not asking her to deny her feelings, but the public doesn't need to know this!!!
I feel you, I do... but I feel her too... LMBO @ burnt to a crisp...

Tab said:
But why walk around with a chip on your shoulder, about something that doesn't concern you? (not you JM) She is in the industry and if her soul burns everytime she see a black man with a white woman, then she should be burnt to a crisp by now. Holding this type of feeling, makes one bitter. BTW...It's really the weathly black men with white women that burns her soul, she said it. If he isnt checking for me and I'm not checking for him, why set my soul on fire?? That's why there are so many ABW, they walk around with this going on inside them. And the majority of them don't see a white face through out their daily routine, but they are still holding on to the negative energy. Enough with this already, it's not gonna change. It's like beating a dead horse. Now if a black man takes it upon himself to disrespect black females by comparing us to his white lady, that's when souls should be set on fire. Until then, this white man is gonna pay for my lunch and I'm going home.
Jill needs to stop it, she has issues. She worded it like a song but it still sings issues. This is starting to sound like brothers who don't want to do and always blame the man.

**NO I AM NOT BRAIN WASHED.
JustMe said:
neither do I, but just cause you doesn't mean its okay to discount her feelings...

Fantasia'sGEDTutor said:
I agree 100%.

Who cares! I don't wince or feel it deep down in my soul, lol.

Tab said:
I am not trying to disregard her feelings but;when I see a black man with a white women, I DON'T CARE! I can no longer make this an issue for me. I have enough baggage. Ppl act like black men dating white women created the h*** in the ozone layer.

Tell me, why does it hurts when the black man is wealthy?
Amen to Jilly!

Its not a mattering of caring,but instead its something that is sad to see.

Black men have little or no loyalty to their women or children and they should be put on blast!

The way to truely show you don't care is by not supporting them or their BS careers!

Like Wesley Snipes! I haven't seen a movie by him since Money Train! He as said in several interviews that black women are gold diggers!

Yep, and that's why the IRS was deep in yo pockets! Smh
there are plenty of people of all colors that feel the exact same way...

livelife25 said:
i've said this before, and i'll say it again: public figures don't need to be making these kinds of statments publicly. it's not as if she's standing up for some major cause, this is simply an opinion. jill is an actress and musician who relies on people OF ALL COLORS to support her endeavors...you don't need to be alienating potential money in your pocket/opportunities with statements like this. i'm not asking her to deny her feelings, but the public doesn't need to know this!!!
no for me it is NOT about the money... Its not even about wanting the Ninja... but if a man can't see beauty in his own people, then he has a problem... but I 100% understand the frustration of seeing a dude that was in looooove with Bonquesha til he cashed that first check, and now only Becky will do...


Tab said:
Ask yourself this, these men that have no loyalty to their black women, do you think they are loyal to their white women? If there is something "messed up" about him for dating outside his race, why would you want him? Again, it's all about the money. Do we care when we see Obobo with Sally? NO! But let it be Kevton King #00 and it's WWIII.
I feel her but damn you're Jill Scott and your soul burns to see this? I don't think this was a good move on her part...Whether we realize it or not, there are a lot of great black women/actresses married to white men as well. This is not healthy for black women or men to allow these type of issues to consume our happiness. If it is meant to be, it will be...The more black women talk about this, the more black men are going to make this happen...The time has come for us to move on past these issues...Every time we do this, we're feeding the egos of many black men who don't deserve it. You're also letting someone know what gets under your skin and eats away at you...That's the worst thing in the world you can do.

Like someone else said, just stop supporting these type of men who set out to discriminate against black women...
Smh I went to theybf.com and there are about 400 comments on this...lol
Have any of you ladies ever dated a white man? I would hate for somebody's soul to start burning because of who I'm dating. It really shouldn't concern them.

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