I'm just not in the,mood for dates right now honestly.. sorry


So that's the text I received yesterday!! Let me explain..
So I just met a NBA ROOKIE who just got drafted,,After a casual conversation
He lets me know that he's been in my city a few days and hasn't been out,
So I say well let's get together and hang out!
So the next day he calls to make plans, I put him off for a few hrs and when I
Called back to meet up he was "busy" so we put it off till the next day.. He even goes as far as to ask me what I wanted to do?
So yesterday rolls around and we talk and he says "what would we do"?
I said there is plenty to do & he says "like where? you tryna go on dates n s*** lol"
I got supper offended! Seeing as how he's the one who claimed he was bored sitting in a hotel & wanted to get out...so today is Sunday he texted me 9am and asked to hang out...smh WHAT TO DO!?

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Tell him to pick a place and time and you will be there. Or, if you feel like leading the horse to water, YOU pick a place and a time and tell him to meet you. Don't ask; TELL.

To me it seems like he wants to “chill”. In this case if I were you I would find something fun, that you been wanting to try and pick a cool restaurant to do dinner. Take the lead like babycheecks suggests, show him your city and most importantly show him YOU. If yall hit off cool if not keep that contact and stay on good terms never know when he can come in handy!

You will either be put in the friend box or in the hook up box. He has made it clear he is not trying to date so its up to you to proceed how you want. Don't suggest dinner or anything that resembles a date that's what he doesn't want. 

Personally I won't put too much effort into it because I can tell what he is about and am not sure if he really wants to be seen with you. Suggest sight seeing since thats what he wants but I can bet he is going to suggest that you come over instead. 

I agree he seems like he wants you to come through and hook up.  That's why you should do something fun with him.  Put him in the friend zone before he officially puts you in the friend zone. 



Bonita said:

You will either be put in the friend box or in the hook up box. He has made it clear he is not trying to date so its up to you to proceed how you want. Don't suggest dinner or anything that resembles a date that's what he doesn't want. 

Personally I won't put too much effort into it because I can tell what he is about and am not sure if he really wants to be seen with you. Suggest sight seeing since thats what he wants but I can bet he is going to suggest that you come over instead.

I never suggested anything like a date! I wanted to walk around downtown since that's where he's staying and maybe grab a drink or shop a little, that's not "date-ish"... I just told him I'd show him around ...& FYI since ive been writing this...he txtd me out the blue and said this mall is nice.. I'm assuming he's shopping but just told me last night he is too tired and worn out to do ANYTHING! Then followed up with when do I want to meet up?
& he has suggested that I come by & chill!! But I have no INTENTIONS ON hooking up! Bad idea?

Gurl you are grown..personally I won't go because I already know what it is. You were not got enough to hang out with or go to the mall. I will be personally offended but again thats me.

How did you meet him?


Bad2theGristle said:

& he has suggested that I come by & chill!! But I have no INTENTIONS ON hooking up! Bad idea?
Yea I'm grown... But everyone needs a little advice every now & then!! Y'all like my girlfriends I've never met! Lol

By that I meant u know what "come over and chill" means. Yes gurl we are one big family!

Bad2theGristle said:

Yea I'm grown... But everyone needs a little advice every now & then!! Y'all like my girlfriends I've never met! Lol
Well I'll just see how it goes cause I know I won't be f***** so if it comes up I'll head for the door & pretend we never met! Simple.. But I'll give him the benefit of doubt



Bonita said:

You will either be put in the friend box or in the hook up box. He has made it clear he is not trying to date so its up to you to proceed how you want. Don't suggest dinner or anything that resembles a date that's what he doesn't want. 

Personally I won't put too much effort into it because I can tell what he is about and am not sure if he really wants to be seen with you. Suggest sight seeing since thats what he wants but I can bet he is going to suggest that you come over instead. 

 

Completely agree with Bonita, "tryin to go out on dates and @#it" statement,  huge red flag.  His indecisiveness, another flag, and him being busy when you called back was possibly because you did it to him. (EGO is real big) The Rx: Put NOTHING emotional into your effort if you hang out, he aint lookin for that.  Don't go to that room as you will morph into his booty call chick, ( and probably an optional at that) unless you can handle that tag and it's what YOU want. All NBA contracts ain't written in stone till after August 1st, and even then it's still up in the air. If you got him, you can get another one. ~Ciao~ 

I wouldn't go, it's silly to go if you know what it is expected.  Why even put yourself in that situation?  If you are interested in getting down and that's all go for it.  But by going to a man's room you know what he's looking for and that's not what your looking for then why go? Is because you like him? In my opinion that is how you burn bridges real fast. 

 

What are you trying to get from this friendship, money, networking, a man?  Once you decide exactly what it is you want then you can create a plan to get just that. 
Bad2theGristle said:

Well I'll just see how it goes cause I know I won't be f***** so if it comes up I'll head for the door & pretend we never met! Simple.. But I'll give him the benefit of doubt

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