I have without a doubt had some of the weirdest experiences with the opposite sex. I don't know if you guys remember my post about the baller with the s*** stained undies, well I have another story. Not as bad as that one, but wacky nonetheless. So here it goes....


A guy I knew from high school had the biggest crush on me back then, but I wasn't really interested because he seemed so shy and fragile. And not very confident, basically he wasn't my type. But he was a very nice person. A few years after high school he contacted me. He had moved to New York and was going to be in New Orleans for the holidays and he wanted to meet up. He was a sweet guy and I enjoyed his company back then, and I still considered him to be a friend of mine so I agreed to the date.

He picked me up at my house and I was shocked to see how good this nigga looked. I couldn't believe that he was the same scrawny lil' boy. He took me to a restaraunt and the casino after. We had so much fun. I was kinda feeling dude. It was getting late and I had to go to work or school ( I don't remember which) the next morning, so we decided to call it a night. We were sitting in the car exchanging small talk and then he leans over to kiss me. I remember being a little hesitant at first, but I slowly started to get comfortable. At this point we are staight up making out. My lil hot ass decides to start sucking and licking on his ear and s***. I should have known better than to do that because I knew it was going to start some s*** I was not about to finish. I guess I got caught up in the kiss.

He kept trying to put my hands down his pants. I told him no and that we should chill out. He started to get real agitated and it was like he became another person. This cool, laid back, down to earth person became possessed.He had this look in his eye that kinda scared me. Then he said, "you gonna tease a nigga and s***, but not give him no p****, it's all good though, but you gonna watch me get me". I didn't understand what he meant until he pulled his d*** out and started beating the f*** out of it!! I kid you not, that nigga looked like he was having a seizure. Shaking all violently and s***!!lol!!! I was just sitting there confused like, what am I suppose to do? Everything was happening so fast. I looked away and he started screaming "LOOK AT ME, LOOK AT ME" It was so hard not to laugh!! This dude wanted me to look him dead in the eye .....while he jacked off.... in a car! Seriously? He kept making all these strange noises and ugly ass faces. The crazier the face the harder I would laugh. But he would still get upset everytime I looked away. He demanded that I look at him jack off eventhough I was laughing my black ass off. Dude went loony on me.

He finally bust one. He cleaned himself off, and started the car up. There was this awkward vibe in the car and I could tell he was kind of embarrassed. So I tried to make a little small talk eventhough I didn't know what to say. So after what seemed like a lifetime of not knowing what to say ,I tried to break the ice with a little joke. I said "Wow, you must be really thirsty from all that screaming and hollering and nut busting. You should probably replenish with this powerade" I was reffering to the hot ass powerade we got from the gas station on the way to the casino. I know I was a b**** fo even going there, but I couldn't resist. He wasn't amused and didn't even respond.He did not say one word to me. We rode all the way home in silence. He wouldn't even turn the radio on. I never heard from him again. HAHAHA!!!

Tags: crazy, dating, stories, worst

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Yes lord....take me now!!

Siren said:

ohhhhhhhhhh fuckkkkkkkkkkkkkk!!!! *we r gathered her today for the homecoming of da_don* he passed away doing what he luved, laughing* man seriously that was to funny. *bows down to sheli*

Sheli said:
Yes really, it's still nasty...Did you read this part "....When I come back in the room this nicca is sitting on the edge of the bed just as calm wiping his face with my shirt. He gonna walk towards me ask me if I'm ok and ask me what I want for breakfast. Telling me "I make a mean omlett" That ninja ate her coochie until it bled, and instead of trying to help, he wanted to make an omlett...even if he thought it was just her cycle coming on he was too calm, ninja should have had some type of reaction besides cooking...only psychos are that calm when they see blood, he was gonna wait until she got light headed, passed out and then he was gonna scramble her ass up in that omlett and REALLY eat her..Hannibal Lecter -----Just my thoughts. LOL

Ph@tty said:
@sheli... Really? I don't think he did it malicously or cuz he was a psyco. I dont think he actually wanted to eat and digest her actual p****. I mean neither of them knew she was bleeding till it dripped in his eye. I think he tried to make the best out of an akward situation.
I don't know if it is just my paranoid behind but that sounds serial killerish. Good for you that he never called back.
LOL, DON don't go into the light, turn around, hold on...You have to excuse my thought process; I always think some off the wall, 1 in a million type s*** will happen.

DA_DON said:
ohhhhhhhhhh fuckkkkkkkkkkkkkk!!!! *we r gathered her today for the homecoming of da_don* he passed away doing what he luved, laughing* man seriously that was to funny. *bows down to sheli*
fa real this is crazy. i get scared seeing my own blood. how da f*** could i have someone elses bloodin my mouth. dats to strong.

Sheli said:
LOL, DON don't go into the light, turn around, hold on...You have to excuse my thought process; I always think some off the wall, 1 in a million type s*** will happen.

DA_DON said:
ohhhhhhhhhh fuckkkkkkkkkkkkkk!!!! *we r gathered her today for the homecoming of da_don* he passed away doing what he luved, laughing* man seriously that was to funny. *bows down to sheli*
Funny, I saw this on Huffington Post and thought this would fit this forum.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2009/09/01/terrance-mccoy-worst-date_...
LMAO, I heard that story on the radio this morning. Ninjas play TOO DAMN MUCH!!!

Ashley Banks said:
Funny, I saw this on Huffington Post and thought this would fit this forum.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2009/09/01/terrance-mccoy-worst-date_...
i woulda ran my black ass all the way home...that was crazyness...it's even crazier that he was normal afterward. i bet he is into some type of freaky fetish ish!

Ashley Banks said:
LOL! I did the same thing.

DA_DON said:
im still trying to figure out why u didnt just get out and run off into the darkness. wow im bout to copy and paste the s*** and send it to some peeps.
i pictured that whole scene in my head! rotflmao!!!

livelife25 said:
okay sista...you take the cake!!! i am the queen of bad dating stories in my circle of friends, but damn.....i applaud you for making a little joke at the end, cause i woulda been so freaked. my worst date ended with the dude refusing to get out of the car until i kissed him. i unhooked my seat belt and brandished the metal part like a weapon....he jumped back and out the car....then wouldn't let go of the effing door so i could drive off! so i asked him to let go of my door and close it, but he refused....well i mashed on the gas, throwing him back into the street, while leaning over to close my door. And this idiot had the nerve to call a few days later and leave a message. WHAT? Needless to say, never seen him again.
wow...he musta saw the blood and i hope he was tryin' to hide the fact that he bit you cause i don't know what the reason would be...uummh idk what to say?!?

Moving In Silence said:
Ok I don't want you to be on here felling like the only 1 with a pysco incounter so I'll share mines.
I was felling kinda down 1 day (years ago) so I decided to treat myself to a drink at a local sports bar 1 afternoon. Well a drink turned into several and the afternoon started to turn to evening. When this younger guy came and started talking to me. (Why didn't it dawn on me that I was drunk smh) well he was hella funny and we sat there drinking and laughing for a while (it had gotten dark outside). Anywho he was decent looking and made me laugh and the alcohol was making me horny lol so we went back to my place.
It was like a hot sex scene in a movie. We walked in and got down to business. We went for hours. We didn't even talk to each other really from the time we walked in. We was flipping around in the bed when he started to eat me. This nigga was down there for 2 hours (no lie). He was down there so long it started to hurt. I tapped him on his head and informed him it was no longer pleasuring me. He then picks me up,lays on the bed on his back and sits me on his face. It didn't hurt as much but it still was felling good either. I tapped him on his forehead and he ignored me. I leaned back to see more of his face but as I did I put my hand in something wet. I looked behide me and saw a few tiny red dots on the bed. (Wtf it was too high on the bed for it to be a period accident and I had already had my period for the month so whered it come from?) Well...I lean back to tell him stop and let me go ...(Yall when I looked down)this nicca's whole face was red! I lifted up and blood started to drip in his eyes and up his nose. I jumped off the bed and blood started to soak my socks. I jet into the bathroom grap a pad and some clothes and start calling my OBGYN's emergancy #. When I come back in the room this nicca is sitting on the edge of the bed just as calm wiping his face with my shirt. He gonna walk towards me ask me if I'm ok and ask me what I want for breakfast. Telling me "I make a mean omlett". Honestly I don't remember if I even locked my door. I took the mofo right back where I found him and went to the ER. Because I was starting to feel liteheaded. When I got back home it looked like a crime scene. There was blood splattered on the walls and bed upstairs. Needless to say I never spoke to him again and don't do 1 nightstands any more.
HELL NAWW! If I see some blood drippin, let alone from a coochie, i would be ready to whoop some ass specially if my face was on it...he had to know he bit her!

Ph@tty said:
@sheli... Really? I don't think he did it malicously or cuz he was a psyco. I dont think he actually wanted to eat and digest her actual p****. I mean neither of them knew she was bleeding till it dripped in his eye. I think he tried to make the best out of an akward situation.
I'm cryin...seriously...cryin! i had to cut and paste this in everybodys messenager at work!...cryin'!

DA_DON said:
ohhhhhhhhhh fuckkkkkkkkkkkkkk!!!! *we r gathered her today for the homecoming of da_don* he passed away doing what he luved, laughing* man seriously that was to funny. *bows down to sheli*

Sheli said:
Yes really, it's still nasty...Did you read this part "....When I come back in the room this nicca is sitting on the edge of the bed just as calm wiping his face with my shirt. He gonna walk towards me ask me if I'm ok and ask me what I want for breakfast. Telling me "I make a mean omlett" That ninja ate her coochie until it bled, and instead of trying to help, he wanted to make an omlett...even if he thought it was just her cycle coming on he was too calm, ninja should have had some type of reaction besides cooking...only psychos are that calm when they see blood, he was gonna wait until she got light headed, passed out and then he was gonna scramble her ass up in that omlett and REALLY eat her..Hannibal Lecter -----Just my thoughts. LOL

Ph@tty said:
@sheli... Really? I don't think he did it malicously or cuz he was a psyco. I dont think he actually wanted to eat and digest her actual p****. I mean neither of them knew she was bleeding till it dripped in his eye. I think he tried to make the best out of an akward situation.

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