Why Are Some Men Intimidated????

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Permalink Reply by Keytolife on November 18, 2009 at 10:26am

Lol your feisty! I can't believe you had to go through that in a marriage! I mean marriage is a whole new ball game, all the jealousy, selfishness and other BS should be done with. He definitely had major issues. Men do need to understand that this is a new era of woman and the independence level is soaring. Of course we will always have the lazy b!tches and gold diggers around but I can't even begin to imagine why a man would want to be bothered with this! What happen riding and dying lol? You got my back I got yours?

Men think we are the most confused creatures but I beg to differ! Per se you do need him and rely on him for everything, he will use this as an excuse to cheat and complain to his friends how your not doing sh!t. I've seen it happen to a lot of females and since they were so dependent on their man they can't function on their own, let alone find a job and work and are basically afraid of the world. This could never be me I could never put my livelihood in a man hands! I love my independence and the ladies in here are right if a dude has this type of mentality then your too GOOD for him anyway!

JustMe said:

its all about Ego, but there will be a man that knows that there is more to life than material possessions, and that there is something he has that he can offer you... that was a major problem in my marriage, my ex felt like I didn't need him for anything, and I didn't, but at one point I did WANT him. But his lil sorry ass attitude killed the want... there can only be one damsel in distress & since I have the p$$y, that bitch has got to be me.
The guy you met, is not ready for a woman that has her shit together. He needs to feel needed. What they usually don't understand is, what happens when the need is no longer there? usually kills the relationship, because the foundation on which it was built will then be nonexistant...

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Permalink Reply by Ordinary G on November 18, 2009 at 11:19am

I think maybe he began to think that u were too career oriented, as i guy I know if I feel a female is all about her job I would probably stop talking to her. Even if u are not u might have just given that off to him.

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Permalink Reply by Ashley Banks on November 18, 2009 at 2:13pm

Insecure men will always find something to be intimidated by. I tend to date men in engineering, computer sciences, academia that make good money and have more than me. I (now) live at home, am driving my old beat up car, and am recovering from a break up where I went from living fab to drab. I have NOTHING right now, but men find me "intimidating" because of how hard I'm working to get my isht together. Some men can't handle a woman that doesn't need them, they want to play the "savior". You could have been broke and just had a nice computer, he would have been intimidated that you know more about technology than he does (this has happened to me SEVERAL times. I can't help that I was raised in front of a computer and not a TV). Girl, just do you and keep building your empire.

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Permalink Reply by Keytolife on November 18, 2009 at 2:26pm

Nah I rarely talked about my career. Now that I am looking back at the situation he probably felt he wouldn't be able to spoil or keep up with me. I was telling him how I am currently paying 3000+ where I live now a month and my mortgage was $4000+ and he was like dammm...your crazy "I don't see my self paying more than a $1000" I should have knew from there he was a bird. I can't help it if I want to live good and in the city!

Ordinary G said:

I think maybe he began to think that u were too career oriented, as i guy I know if I feel a female is all about her job I would probably stop talking to her. Even if u are not u might have just given that off to him.

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Permalink Reply by Keytolife on November 18, 2009 at 2:30pm

I respect your realness 100%!!!! Your still doing a lot better than some and you working hard to maintain what you have. But I feel when it comes to the pockets...if your doing better than your man or someone your dating there will always be problems! Some men find independence sexy some don't.

Ashley Banks said:

Insecure men will always find something to be intimidated by. I tend to date men in engineering, computer sciences, academia that make good money and have more than me. I (now) live at home, am driving my old beat up car, and am recovering from a break up where I went from living fab to drab. I have NOTHING right now, but men find me "intimidating" because of how hard I'm working to get my isht together. Some men can't handle a woman that doesn't need them, they want to play the "savior". You could have been broke and just had a nice computer, he would have been intimidated that you know more about technology than he does (this has happened to me SEVERAL times. I can't help that I was raised in front of a computer and not a TV). Girl, just do you and keep building your empire.

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Permalink Reply by Starr on November 18, 2009 at 4:13pm

Um... I hope you don't take this the wrong way, but I gotta be real with you. I think Ordinary G makes a valid point. You say you don't talk about your career that much, but you have mentioned it several times on BA already (even though you didn't say what it was). Dropping how much $$$ you spend every month on your place and telling everyone you have a Benz comes off as bragging to me. I really don't know you at all, but just in this short time that you have been posting, I know you have a CLK "500" (which you so proudly display a replica in your profile pic), you are upgrading to the SLK550 "real soon", you spend $3,000 "+" on your place, you had/have a mortgage of $4,000 "+", and you have some fabulous career where you make a lot of money that you rarely talk about. Maybe men aren't intimidated, maybe they are turned off. Also, I don't see how not wanting to spend over $1,000 a month on a place makes him a bird. Many people don't spend over that and have stacks of money sitting in accounts accruing interest. Maybe that young man is not at that point yet, but living within his means makes him smart.

Keytolife said:

Nah I rarely talked about my career. Now that I am looking back at the situation he probably felt he wouldn't be able to spoil or keep up with me. I was telling him how I am currently paying 3000+ where I live now a month and my mortgage was $4000+ and he was like dammm...your crazy "I don't see my self paying more than a $1000" I should have knew from there he was a bird. I can't help it if I want to live good and in the city!

Ordinary G said:

I think maybe he began to think that u were too career oriented, as i guy I know if I feel a female is all about her job I would probably stop talking to her. Even if u are not u might have just given that off to him.

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Permalink Reply by Keytolife on November 18, 2009 at 4:34pm

Far from bragging I consider myself to be blessed. I came from nothing so I know what it is like to have and not to have. I am still working hard to maintain what I have just like anyone else. I am sorry if it appeared to you as if I was bragging that is the last thing i'd do because I hate when people do it to me. About my Benz, I simply commented on shorty having the 350 and how Mercedes are simply the best car (my opinion)! Everything you mentioned occurred in one discussion so its not like going all over the site bolstering. It's not that serious. As far as the amount of money I spend on my pad I like to live nice and I never live outside my means. Good luck finding anything in the city now days under $1000! Inflation and the times have changed. So I did not brag to him he asked me something which lead up to me breaking it down to him. And after all your are on BALLERALERT so if I was bragging you'd just have to take it for what it was. (And as a FYI I did not take your comment the wrong way it's always two sides to everything)
Starr said:

Um... I hope you don't take this the wrong way, but I gotta be real with you. I think Ordinary G makes a valid point. You say you don't talk about your career that much, but you have mentioned it several times on BA already (even though you didn't say what it was). Dropping how much $$$ you spend every month on your place and telling everyone you have a Benz comes off as bragging to me. I really don't know you at all, but just in this short time that you have been posting, I know you have a CLK "500" (which you so proudly display a replica in your profile pic), you are upgrading to the SLK550 "real soon", you spend $3,000 "+" on your place, you had/have a mortgage of $4,000 "+", and you have some fabulous career where you make a lot of money that you rarely talk about. Maybe men aren't intimidated, maybe they are turned off. Also, I don't see how not wanting to spend over $1,000 a month on a place makes him a bird. Many people don't spend over that and have stacks of money sitting in accounts accruing interest. Maybe that young man is not at that point yet, but living within his means makes him smart.
Keytolife said:

Nah I rarely talked about my career. Now that I am looking back at the situation he probably felt he wouldn't be able to spoil or keep up with me. I was telling him how I am currently paying 3000+ where I live now a month and my mortgage was $4000+ and he was like dammm...your crazy "I don't see my self paying more than a $1000" I should have knew from there he was a bird. I can't help it if I want to live good and in the city!

Ordinary G said:

I think maybe he began to think that u were too career oriented, as i guy I know if I feel a female is all about her job I would probably stop talking to her. Even if u are not u might have just given that off to him.

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