'Think Like A Man' has proven itself to be a Box Office hit raking in $33Million in its opening week. The movie is based on Steve Harvey's book "Act Like A Lady, Think Like A Man". In the movie they touch on the infamous 90 Day Rule. This rule has been around long before Steve Harvey's book. The 90 Day Rule basically says that a woman should make a man wait 90 days before having sex. Does this work? Are the "games" really proving anything? I asked my Twitter followers and actually got a pretty good mix of responses.
Ladies, would you make a man wait 90 days for sex?
- yeah cause I may not even like u after 20 days
- I would...I did...waaaay longer than 90 days. We are married now. We were each other's 1st. Met at 17.
- at this point in my life knowing what I know- YES!
- No! That would mean I would have to wait!
Fellas, would you wait 90 days for sex?
- people have waiting much longer you know? you mean do we prefer or would we want too...a nigga will wait years lol we do most of the time...we wait from the moment we see people! lmao
- absolutely not. I can't think of one valid reason to wait 90 days
- I've waited years. More than once. I never really invest time and money just for sex. That's just prolonged prostitution. I'm in it for the person. If they're worth it, I don't really care about the wait. I'll tell you this...I always told my female cousins to stick to that 90 day rule. If he's there for you...he'll wait. If not, better you get rid of him now instead of wasting your time.
- HELLLL NO SON....*in my angriest DMX voice*
- Only if I was getting some from somewhere else instead..
So if we think like a man for a moment it looks like some men will wait, some men will not. I won't tell you who these answers are from but these are all seemingly good guys. Some of which are married, some have been in pretty long relationships. Although the answer from women varied like the men, it seems that more of us would wait. Here are my thoughts on waiting.
The whole strategic game thing is a load of b*******. Women weren't built to think like men. Every time we try, we over think. You know why? Because men are far less complex than we are. If a man says he's cold, he really is cold. When a woman says she's cold, she really wants you to take the jacket off your back and give it to her. There's no way that we can fix our complex minds to think like a simple man. We shouldn't have to. We're built different for a reason, to compliment each other. Why would you make a man wait 90 days for sex? I say you don't have sex until YOU are ready. There's no time stamp on that. If you know you're ready to have sex with someone within 90 seconds, go ahead and do it! We're all adults. If it takes you 90 years, do you! Two people should not have sex until they're ready. Making him wait 90 days when you knew 89 days ago that you'd let him hit, all because Steve Harvey said so, is dumb. Him waiting 90 days doesn't mean that he's a great guy and you'll be together forever. Sleeping with a man after the second time doesn't mean he only wants you for the sex. Building a meaningful relationship has everything to do with communication, period. I think women should Think Like Women. If a man wants someone who thinks like him, he's more interested in peen than you. If a man is really into you, he'll make it loud and clear, whether sex is involved or not. There is no shortage of vagina in the world. Steve Harvey makes great points in the video below, but I'm not buying that it's at all that easy.
Comment by Creative Bee on April 26, 2012 at 11:50am
This
" I say you don't have sex until YOU are ready. There's no time stamp on that."
Most of the guys will agree to wait and will be screwing on the side if they are no into you or if they just don't want relationship in general, you have to learn who the person really is and if you want to risk your life sleeping with them. Lets be honest sex is a dangerous affair with all stds floating around which can be transmitted even if you are using condoms.
I think the whole 90 day rule is B.S.. Say I wait 90 days give him the goods and on the 92nd day he leaves, now what? Huh Steve? I know men who will wait 100 for the coochie and leave once they get it b/c that's all they wanted. I know the purpose in the 90 day rule is to make him see you as more than "just some coochie" but if a man isn't feeling you waiting 9, 90, or 900 days won't change the fact that he going to smash and dash.
My best relationship was with the dude I slept with after 2 weeks, my most volatile was with the dude I made wait damn near a year. All that backed up energy he had DOOMED us, LOL
My thing is this, if a man wants to just f*** you and leave he's not waiting 3 months to do it! If you wasnt giving it up after the first or second date he would leave. The 90 day rule was invented to protect women, yet were the dumb asses saying no to it. For those who have read the book the whole point is this, if he cant stick around for 90 days without having sex, what would make him a good boyfriend or Father or husband? The secret is, if a man really truely likes you, he will WAIT as long as you want him to wait. If he aint into you like that and he just want to f***, he aint waiting 90 days at all. Studies show it takes 90 days to develop a habit, so esentially you are training him to do things your way, to respect you, date you and then you reward him with the sex. Sex is a reward for men. We as women need to realize that sex is the greatest pleasure you could give a man. So why give it to him without reason? Ask any man what is the one thing he wants to do before he dies? And he will tell you-sex! It's not like you have to tell him he's on a 3 month trial its just you taking things slow and see if he is likes you enough to hang in there and develop a genuine interest in you and not the sex. You will see that most men wont make it. And thats great for you because you have weeded out the bad seeds! Sure if he wants to f*** other women while dating you-fine! You can do the same. You all are not yet in a relationship so you can't expect that. That's the beauty of the dating process. You can date whoever you want. So why be one of those women he just wants to f***? Why not be the woman he is spending time with, courting, dating, and falling in love with. You all are not married. And definitely not in a relationship as a relationship with a good foundation will need atleast three months to cultivate. Thats the point of the three month rule. To get people to slow down, get to know each other, and learn how to date for goodness sakes. These rules apply to men and women looking for love and real relationships. Not your around the way negro looking to f*** every girl he can. Think about it like this, if he cant wait 90 days for you will he wait by your side 9months if you turn up pregnant? After that 90 day wait the sex will be rewarding for him and he will want nothing more than you. And you will also have a committed relationship from him as well, if that is what your standards are. Steve is trying to get women to have some standards, and to enforce those standards while keeping your legs shut. Cause you can't be hollering you need to do this and that but you still rewarding him. If more women did this we would all be better off. Its like paying it forward. And if you cant wait then hey... The cycle continues. Too many men out here are getting the p**** for doing absolutely nothing. Then we sit there with bills still unpaid, pregnant, alone, and dateless, but yet we still gave it up to a ni**a. It protects us. It all boils down to one thing, get what YOU want before you give it up. The p**** is a reward for these ni**as!
I agree with Sheli.... 9 days or 90 days, who gives a damn. I've slept with a man within a week and we were together for 2 years...the one I MADE wait 90 days, that was the one that had another hoe in the house and left me when my grandma died and when I went into the hospital...soooooo
The 90 day rule has it's ups and downs. I think it truly depends on what the intentions are from both parties and also what "type" of relationship you both desire for.
I think you all are missing the point and Steve really didn't think like a woman when he put it together. You are waiting 90 days SO YOU CAN SEE WHAT KIND OF MAN HE IS! lol Sex complicates things. Especially if it is that good good make your coochay tremble hours later sex. Once you get that, if he ain't about shyt you will stick with his azz regardless. The 90 Day rule gives you the chance to really know him without the complications of sex. It ain't about him or your body's needs. It is about getting to know this man. Because if he is an azz, you'll see it a whole lot quicker and it will be easier to walk away before you get the good good.
Remember, shiftless azzhole men always that put the good good on your azz. *drops mic*
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