Comment by AllyNWonderland on April 26, 2012 at 4:24pm

*steal

Comment by Sheli on April 26, 2012 at 4:48pm

Just curious does the 90 rule and thinking like a man, acting like a lady apply to male-on-male relationships?

Anyway....Everyone is on their best behavior during the beginning of a real courtship, no one is their "true self" we all send in representatives who try to be on our best behavior. So say said male is doing almost everything right in those first 90 days, this still doesn't prevent the inevitable, that you get caught up, he changes, & your feelings get hurt, there's no way around that, it's life. True without the complication of sex, you're more aware, but it'll still happen. So I don't see the "Gospel"  in the 90-Day rule. Women are usually good judges of character, we know what kind of man Eric from accounting is, we just choose to overlook those not so good qualities, that later come to bite us in the ass. I will agree with Steve in saying we give men WAY TOO much power over us.

Comment by Love is a Losing Game on April 26, 2012 at 6:51pm

Personally, I think this rule ish is a crock of bull. There is no way to ensure that a man will stay with you and 'respect you enough to be faithful to you' just because u made him wait 90 days. Steve, if my comprehension was on point, said that you two should be in a COMMITTED relationship for 90 days before u give it up. Not just merely communicating and dating for 90 days before u let him hit. COMMITTED means he's not hitting side chicks while he is waiting on your 90 days to pass. If he is hittin other chicks, then this is not was steve was talking about. I think its dumb to put a time frame on when YOU should be ready to get it in. This is a way to slow women down, but in my opinion, this thinking can make a woman become very bitter. If a man sees you as wife material, that is what he sees in you. These rules can mess his perception up, because he will think you can't make decisions for yourself. I don't think you should let him hit after a day or week or whatever, but if you do so what? And I know many people who have gotten married after they had sex very early in their courtship. Ijs, think with your own mind, not what steve is saying.

Comment by Ms. BoiBye on April 26, 2012 at 7:24pm

Im sorry.  I am not and will not take relationship advice from a man who abused his wife and is a damn comedian.

Comment by CCD is Workin on a baller 4 she on April 26, 2012 at 8:00pm

No one is saying that it is guaranteed that he will stay with you if you wait 90 days or more to have sex. I'm saying that if you wait until you know him you might not get got. Not every woman is a good judge of character. If that were true then the book wouldn't have been a best seller, become a movie, and grossed $33 million in its first weekend. Everyone learns to recognize game at a different pace. What I pick up as game in the first 90 seconds of meeting a guy some other chick might not pick up even after 90 days. What is the harm in waiting 90 days anyway? If he is a good man then he'll wait because he knows there are a lot of shiftless azzhole guys out here pretending to be good men. He'll wait until you trust him. If he's just a shiftless azzhole guy you might end up saving yourself some aggravation and mileage on your puzzi.

Hey, to each their own. But if a woman is looking back over her past relationships and seeing that she gets a lot of bums that she didn't find out were bums until they got in her panties then maybe it might be a good idea for her to institute a waiting period. JMHO

Comment by Love is a Losing Game on April 26, 2012 at 8:32pm

Cc I agree....but if a woman sees this from her past relationships, maybe she should start to try to figure out why she chooses shiftless men. Then do the waiting period. I just don't want to get all hyped up thinking if I do it this way or that way then it means he truly loves me. The book was successful because it preyed on one thing that women want most and that is a successful relationship and a husband. Not because steve has all the answers. And let me just say, megan good broke her 90 days at like day 65 because dude mistakenly told her he loved her. The movie and book were very inconsistent.

Comment by OLD $PICE PINE NEEDLE on April 26, 2012 at 9:24pm

Men are aware of this 'rule' so IMO there are other ways to get them to respect you as 'relationship material'.

Comment by JustMe on April 26, 2012 at 11:54pm

I'm with CC... The 90 day rule is just to learn the guy. Much like your probationary period at a new job... Waiting 90 days won't guarantee the best results, but it will cut out some of the bull...

Comment by CCD is Workin on a baller 4 she on April 27, 2012 at 8:51am

Thanks, JM, that's what I was saying succinctly.

LIALG, if you have an orifice for a man to stick his penis in then you will attract shiftless men. Period. Everyone just isn't good at seeing them a mile away like I can. I got a friend now who is so money savvy her and Suze Orman are just sisters from another mother. lol But when it comes to men? Ugh! I want to smack her!

Comment by University of Smitty on April 27, 2012 at 9:25am

I agree with CC. 

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