Lawrence Vickers Is The True Definition Of Fire Crotch

Here's a little story to bring a little sunshine to your weekend. Last Wednesday Dallas Cowboys fullback, Lawrence Vickers, was in for a rude awakening when a family of fire ants mistook his testicles for an ant pile during practice. What makes maters worse, Vickers recently discovered he is allergic to fire ants. Yikes!

“I was trying not to squeeze myself in front of women out there,” Vickers said. “I wanted to pull my pants down and run inside, but I couldn’t do that. When those ants get close to those testicles, there ain’t no laughing about that.”

Luckily the fire ants didn't require the use of an Epipen, which he had to use for a previous fire ant incident. A shower and a little Benedryl and Vickers was back on the field.

Views: 1061

Comment by Sexy Jay on June 9, 2012 at 4:49pm

lol fire crotch!!!

Comment by Moving In Silence on June 9, 2012 at 5:34pm

Poor thang. That's ok that just means he's sweet like honey lol

Comment by TheLadyJosephine on June 9, 2012 at 8:41pm

I've got a couple of questions:

How are the ants getting in his pants?  The pants are skin tight so were they in the pants before he put them on or are the ants on the field and crawling up his leg, down his shirt?  Can he not feel the ants before they reach his testies?  In order to get to his testies, they had to reach his butt first, right?  Why is he waiting till they reach his testies to get off the field and take care of that?  Why is this the SECOND incident?  Why is his crotch attracting the ants rather than others?  Why hasn't the stadium been deloused to get rid of the fire ants?  

Just wondering O_O.

Comment by AllyNWonderland on June 9, 2012 at 10:25pm
I just KNEW this was gonna be a STD story....took all the fun out of it lol
Comment by Miss Good on June 10, 2012 at 1:35am
Lol @ ally, yeah that title reeled me in. Poor guy lol
Comment by Monica Amazing on June 11, 2012 at 1:23pm

lololol

Comment by BlackSnakeMoan on June 11, 2012 at 1:39pm

this means he has salty sweaty balls. Ants love sweat because of the salt content.

Comment by Baller Alert on June 12, 2012 at 7:39pm

lol@blacksnakemoan

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