Baller Mail - Tell Me Where My Boyfriend Is Going Every Weekend

Hey ladies and gents! This Baller Mail was submitted by one of our readers who is in an odd predicament. Read below and see if you can figure out what's going on.

 

I have been with my man for a little over a year and we are happy for the most part. My thing is he goes to NC every weekend for his job but I have never been with him and I don’t have a land-line number for his job. I have searched his company but when I call his company no one can help me.

 

I didn’t start questioning him until recently and it has started a riff in our household. My cousin said I need to use the iPhone feature that locates his phone and go to where it says because she believes he has another family in NC. I couldn’t see him having another family but something is going on. My other friend said she thinks he is gay and he goes to see his lover on the weekends.

 

Please help me what should I do. I don’t want to be that nagging girlfriend but this is starting to bother me like crazy! I need some help from people that don’t really know the situation.

Now here's my 2 cents on the situation. I couldn't tell you if he's cheating, got a secret family or gay but what I can tell you is something is entirely wrong with this situation. You've been with a man for over a year and you don't know how to reach him in case of an emergency outside of his cell? Have you been to his job? Do you know where he works? Such information can be found via Google but if you don't know where he works then that is your first red flag. Finding out he doesn't have a job, or even a job that requires him to travel, could throw a wrench in his whole operation and give you all the information you need to know. Does he talk about work with you? Do you know his supervisor's name or his role in the company? These are small things that come out during a year of dating someone.

I'm a huge person on trust and not violating someone's privacy unless you are ready to reap the consequences that come along with it. If you are at a point of using a GPS tracker, which is all "Find My iPhone" really is, then you are at a point where your trust has been violated. Just keep in mind, if it turns out he is not in NC, then what? Do you blow up his cell and demand an explanation? What if he is in NC? Do you drive/fly down there and find out what's going on? If you don't plan on doing anything then going through such lengths to find out this information isn't going to do anything but drive you more crazy. This is the equivalent of looking through his phone. Don't do it unless you're ready for all that comes with it.

Something you may be able to try is telling him that you have a family reunion in NC one of the weekends he goes and suggest that you two drive down together. Then you read his reaction. If he's perfectly fine with it, he may be on the up and up. If he's combative, something is wrong. This would be a good time to start some dialog about where he is actually going.

Views: 522

Comment by Nala on January 1, 2013 at 12:41pm
*starts playing trust & believe*
Comment by blackfujones on January 2, 2013 at 10:37pm

If he says thas where he is than thats where he is.If you dont believe it then move on bc it's just gonna stress everyone involved. Hell I had a job where there was no landline, and i'd be in no mans land in other states all the time and my only connection was a cellphone.So it depends on what job it is and if you trust him or not basically which it really seems like you dont. And dont listen to what ya friends say, more than likely they want ya guy anyways.

Comment by Bonita on January 3, 2013 at 11:43am
Personally I won't be tracking anyone but my hubby. True story a friend of mine installed a tracking devise in her man's car and could track his whereabouts online. She quickly discovered that his ass was driving to another state to be with his gf and would lie about it. It was so funny when she called him and tried to pretend like he was around the corner until she told him exactly what street he just drove thru. They spilt up and it took a while to sell the house they owned together. Point is once you find out what will you do? No point in going down that road if you don't plan on leaving him. You will either confirm your doubts or he will loose trust in you for being bat s*** crazy
Comment by BlkButtafly on January 3, 2013 at 11:53am

Funny you mention a tracking device @Bonita. I know someone right now who wants to install one on their husband's car. But it's for solid evidence for a divorce.

Comment by Bonita on January 3, 2013 at 12:05pm
@blkbuttafly exactly! If I don't plan on divorcing my husband ignorance is bliss. I will be one of those tight lip wives don't need everyone in my business.
Comment by Bonita on January 3, 2013 at 12:05pm
@blkbuttafly exactly! If I don't plan on divorcing my husband ignorance is bliss. I will be one of those tight lip wives don't need everyone in my business.
Comment by CCD is Workin on a baller 4 she on January 3, 2013 at 12:20pm

You're just the girlfriend. Settle your azz down. He more than likely has another life, be it wife/boyfriend. What you need to decide is what are you getting out of this relationship and if it is what you want. If not, then bounce. The only reason I'd track him is to make sure he isn't fugging a dude. Whether it is a dude or another woman it is paycheck time. Take your heart out of the equation, have a good cry this coming weekend and then get what you came for.

If he is a baller handling ish then sit down and play the hell out of your position. If he is a regular dude that you are "in love" with? *shrug*

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