Do Women Want A Dominant Man Or A Man Who Caters?

Given only a choice of either a dominant man or one who caters to her, which do you think more women would choose? Before assessing, it's important to understand that neither of these men are "a bad thing" so choosing one over another is not going with the lesser of two evils. Consider the positive points in each one.

A dominant man does not mean that he is over powering and controlling. That's not dominance at all. A dominant man is a man who exudes leadership qualities. A man a woman trusts to follow because she knows that she is safe walking the path he chose for them. A dominant man is decisive and sure of himself. Ironically, most women who choose the dominant man are dominant alpha women. Alpha women tend to get tired of leading all of the time and sometimes just want someone to take the reins every now and then. A dominant woman is used to walking over men. It's our nature to enjoy a bit of a challenge or resistance. It's the masochist in us. 

Meanwhile a catering man is also a great man. This does not necessarily mean that he is a push over. It more so means that he puts you above himself. A catering man is more likely to ask you what you would like for dinner, where a dominant man will order for you. A catering man can be looked at as more caring, I suppose. He's likely to bring you breakfast in bed, rub your feet when you get off of work, and basically take care of your every whim and desire. A catering man is one you could expect to take your wants and needs into consideration above his own.

Given that it's hard to find either one of these men as it is, in an ideal world which would you choose? 

I believe that women are like small children to an extent. Think back to when you were a child, a toddler or so. Everything your parents told you to do, you just did it. Why? Just because. You followed your parents where ever they went. You trusted their judgement and it never dawned on you that maybe they didn't have all of the answers. That's exactly how most of us want our men. There's a reason we chase after men who remind us of our fathers. We want someone who will walk us through life without us having a care in the world. Now back to my childhood analogy. Think back to when you cried and mom wiped your tears, cleaned your diaper, bathed you and nurtured you. Remember those times when dad tied your shoes, and put your hair in those ugly, lop-sided pig tails because mom had to go to work early and it was picture day. Women want our men that way as well. I don't know many women who don't enjoy effort being put towards her. Effort in her appearance, effort in her safety and effort in her thoughts. Sometimes we don't want to be women and just want to be catered to like a small child again.

In this day and age it's hard to find either one of these scenarios, let alone a good mix of the two. Somewhere relationships are no longer a stepping stone to a healthy marriage. Relationships are either strictly business/popularity moves, or just something to pass the time. In a world full of breaks, side-chicks and babies outside of marriage, you have to really sift through the dirt to find a good man -- a caterer or a dominant one.

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Comment by Tone on January 16, 2014 at 12:13pm
Women keep saying it hard to find a good man when they really don't even look for one.
Comment by B Thang on January 16, 2014 at 12:31pm
I personally like a mix of both. Dominance is a sexy quality in a man, for him to take charge because he knows what's best or what he wants is attractive. On the flip side he knows that he has to cater to his woman especially when it's spontaneous. It's hard to just want one of those qualities lol
Comment by luvsmoochez on January 16, 2014 at 12:41pm

It would definitely be optimal to have a mix, but I tend to attract Alpha Males. I like a man that is a leader, because I have a strong personality. If I have a man that caters too much I will run him over and in the long run won't respect him. I good man knows when to be stern on a position and when to bend.

Comment by Denise Love on January 16, 2014 at 12:44pm

I agree with B thang.

It is hard to find one or the other. Is the catering man really passive aggressive? And do dominant men even exists anymore? It seems like these guys are soft. I personally like the dominant, head of the household type. I don't mind the man being the head of the house as long as I can be dominant in the bedroom. And I mean on some real dominant feline ish. LOL In my own world, I bring a whole new meaning to me being submissive to a man. Although, I do consider myself an alpha female. I love that ish... it's sexy. Are you kiddin me?

Comment by Formally Known as Ginger on January 16, 2014 at 12:55pm

I need a balance. I don't want a man who runs all over me nor do I want a man I can run all over. I need a man who is a man first and foremost and will let me know when I'm out of pocket.

Comment by MsPretty92 on January 16, 2014 at 1:13pm
@Ginger took the words right out of my mouth!
Comment by Love is a Losing Game on January 16, 2014 at 1:22pm

For me, I LOVE a dominant man. The problem comes in when he is dominant, but has no real reason to be....like hardly works, makes little money, no foresight into future, no saving skills, no history of on-time payments being made for bills, excuses responsibility, indecisive, contradictory....manipulative...stuff like that. Yea he can be "dominant" but really has no reason to be until he truly gets his affairs in order. On the flip side, I could never date the passive type, but I'd love to be catered to. I guess that's why I'm single haha

Comment by Empowered Woman aka $picey on January 16, 2014 at 2:54pm

Nice post. Some men don't know the difference.

@Tone (c) are u, dominant, catering or a p****?

Comment by blackfujones on January 16, 2014 at 3:38pm
I'd dig this post like a damm grave. I am a mix of both dominant and caretaker. To a fault I watch over the women n my life because my dad didnt do it for my mom. So my daughters, fiance, female friends. I try to instill a sense of safety when they're around me. But over the years ive learned when to cut that dominant faucet off and be a caretaker. Sometimes my woman justs wants a footrub and an ear to listen to her. That comes from age and tskin losses
Comment by blackfujones on January 16, 2014 at 3:47pm
Be nice spice

as men at times its hard to be both because women will take advantage or feel taken advantage of if you give to much of one characteristic

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