How are we raising our Boys?? by @beinghersheykissblogger

So I stumbled across this video on Youtube and felt compelled to throw pen to paper and vent. Okay well fingers to keys but you know what I mean.

The video shows, two young boys, roughly ages 10-13 fighting. One is being coerced by who appears to his mother. She's  constantly screaming in this video, saying "Fight him Dante', fight him! You gonna be a man today!"

It is clear this little boy does not want to fight, and even more apparent after they start to tussle and fall to ground, when he starts to lose, he's crying hysterically. The mother grabs his hands and put them into a fighting position. Saying to him "Stop crying! I'm right here! Fight him"

Okay. So this video can be looked at various ways and interpreted differently.

It is important to teach our children, not just our young boys but especially them in a sense, to protect themselves an/or stand up for themselves when it matters. This world is dog eat dog, and there is no room for weakness. So with that being said, I do feel a sense to teach my son or my daughter that they have to be able to defend themselves in any situation, when necessary.  Unfortunately we do not have the luxury of seeing actually what happened prior to this fight between these two boys that prompted this. One could have been being bullied by the other and the mother decided it was time for her son to stand up for himself. In the black community it is not uncommon for kids to be taught how to fight, and they may actually be punished when they get home if they did not.

To me that is the only logical reason as to why the mother would want her son to fight.  If he doesn't defend himself now, as he gets older, he'll become more passive and allow anyone to step over him.

Now on the other hand.....

If this is anything opposite of that, then she is dead ass wrong. We also as parents have the responsibility of teaching our children on how to make logical, thought out, reasonable choices. Everything in life is not worth a fight. So if this boy was verbally picking on him, but had not put his hands on him , he should have reacted differently. This is the gift and the curse of being a child. Children don't know any better. So at times, and for most children, don't have the mental capacity to handle their emotions. That's why as babies they cry when they are hungry, sleepy, and need a diaper change. They are not able to communicate effectively. With adolescents, it's the same. When their feelings are hurt, they will either lash out and attack or some may cower and cry. We as the adults have to teach them to find a happy medium.

All of this has got me to thinking about the Trayvon Martin situation. Since he was from the same neighborhood I was raised in (Carol City, Miami Gardens) I am sure he was instilled the values as most young men from my neighborhood was. Protect yourself. Be a man. Don't let anyone punk you or try you.

But where did that get him? He's no longer here to tell his side of the story. Although I am totally against GZ ( I don't know even want to write his name I'm so disgusted with him) I just can't help but to wonder. Should he have picked his battle wisely and ran for help? Or stood his ground and fought like a man?

What are your thoughts on this??

XOXOXO Kiss

Views: 588

Comment by blackfujones on January 18, 2014 at 12:23pm

As young men/young boys/growing black men, our mentors teach us that we'd rather die on our feet then live on our knees.  Life isnt guaranteed to any of us and sometimes we have to fight.  And at times we are made into martyrs like trayvon

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